Things Ewings Say (J.R. Edition)

Things Ewings Say (J.R. Edition) copy

Bullet-proof

If the first season of TNT’s “Dallas” taught us anything, it’s this: J.R. Ewing (Larry Hagman) still has a way with words. With “Revelations,” the eagerly awaited season finale two days away, here’s a look back at some of his best lines.

• “Son, the courts are for amateurs and the faint of heart.”

Responding to John Ross’s suggestion that he could win a legal fight with Bobby in “Changing of the Guard”

• “Son, never pass up a good chance to shut up.”

Imparting more wisdom to John Ross in “Hedging Your Bets”

• “I hate to hit a man below the belt, but you know I will.”

Threatening Mitch Lobell in “Hedging Your Bets”

• “Time has not been kind to that face.”

Upon seeing Cliff Barnes for the first time in many years in “The Price You Pay”

• “Bullets don’t seem to have much an effect on me, darlin’.”

Greeting a shotgun-wielding Ann in “The Price You Pay”

• “I’m going to tell you the truest thing my daddy ever told me: Nobody gives you power. Real power is something you take.”

Quoting Jock to John Ross in “The Price You Pay”

• “Those people are not passing away because of old age. They’re trying to get away from the food.”

Describing the culinary options at his nursing home in “The Price You Pay”

• “That Mexican girl?”

Describing Elena in “The Last Hurrah”

• “Our girl is crazier than an outhouse rat.”

Describing Marta in “The Last Hurrah”

• “Are you really going to break bread with this lowlife?”

Upon learning Sue Ellen plans to have lunch with Cliff in “The Last Hurrah”

• “Well what fun would I get out of telling you that?”

His response when John Ross asks where he’s going in “Truth and Consequences”

• “For a chance to make money from me, Cliff Barnes would push his mama in a puddle of piranhas.”

Assessing his chances of joining Cliff’s high-stakes poker game in “The Enemy of My Enemy”

• “A cheated man is a dangerous man. Just ask my son.”

Describing Frank Ashkani in “Collateral Damage”

• “OK, I admit, I have lapses where I do wrong now and then.”

Offering Bobby the understatement of a lifetime in “Family Business”

What’s your favorite J.R. quote from “Dallas’s” first season? Share your choices below and read more features from Dallas Decoder.

Drill Bits: TNT’s ‘Dallas’ Wins Cable Ratings Gold

Dallas, Family Business, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, TNT

You should see the other guys

“Dallas” brought ratings gold to TNT this week: Despite tough competition from the Olympics, “Family Business,” the show’s latest episode, debuted to 3.2 million viewers on August 1, becoming the evening’s most-watched cable program.

The “Dallas” audience included more than 1 million viewers between the ages of 18 and 49, the demographic advertisers pay a premium to reach. Ratings in this demo were up 8 percent from July 25, when roughly 850,000 18-to-49-year-olds watched “No Good Deed,” TNT’s previous “Dallas” episode.

This makes “Dallas” one of the few shows to get a ratings boost in the crucial demo during NBC’s Olympics coverage, which has delivered blockbuster numbers each night since the games began last week.

J.R. Ewing, Superlative Senior

Younger viewers may love “Dallas,” but the show is making waves among older audiences, too.

TNT’s depiction of J.R. as an elderly man who is nonetheless full of life is smart and refreshing, writes Elizabeth Newman, senior editor for McKnight’s, a trade publication for caregivers.

“[I]n all our pop culture portrayals of either lauding saintly grandmother types, trying to make people cringe laugh at the idea of old people being sexual (I’m looking at you, Betty White), or introducing the wacky grandfather, it’s refreshing to see a complex character in his 80s get a new lease on life,” Newman writes.

The Woman Who Saved J.R.’s Life

Speaking of superlative seniors: The Star Newspapers of Plano, Texas caught up this week with Barbara Kain, who was a stand-in for Barbara Bel Geddes on the original “Dallas” series and also played the nurse who treats J.R. after his shooting in “No More Mr. Nice Guy, Part 1.”

“I always say that I helped save J.R’s life,” Kain tells the publication.

The Double-Crosser’s Double

While we’re nosing around community newspaper websites: The Abilene Reporter-News recently profiled Gregg Dickerson, a J.R. Ewing lookalike who hires himself out for parties and other events. By the way: The Reporter-News has a long history of finding local angles in its “Dallas” coverage.

Department of Misleading Headlines

Dallas, Elena Ramos, Jordana Brewster, Last Hurrah, TNT

She loves it

The Toronto Star and a handful of other news outlets carried the following headline this week: “Brewster: I couldn’t live in Dallas.”

What’s this? Is “Dallas” heroine Jordana Brewster dissing show’s namesake city?

No, silly. Read the whole story.

“I love it there,” the actress says, adding that she met her husband while filming a movie in Texas.

Here’s the rest of Brewster’s quote: “We would love to be able to have a house there, but I don’t know if I could live in Dallas. I live in California, where you can basically wear whatever you want and be pretty casual and the lifestyle is laid back. In Dallas the women are dressed up at 7 a.m. and they’re always in heels and if you go out to a restaurant they’re never in jeans.”

See? Brewster likes Dallas just fine, thank you very much.

Line of the Week

“No, J.R., your lapses aren’t when you do wrong. Your lapses are when you do right.”

Bobby (Patrick Duffy) to his older brother in one of the many moving scenes from “Family Business.”

A Twist, But No Zing

The latest “Dallas Drinks” recipe from Cook In/Dine Out: The Sue Ellen. To honor Linda Gray’s reinterpretation of her classic character, this drink is a fresh take on an old standard: the Cosmopolitan.

And yes, it’s a “mocktail.” Who do you think we are, Harris Ryland?

“Drill Bits,” a roundup of news about TNT’s “Dallas,” is published regularly. Share your comments below.

TNT’s Dallas Styles: Bobby’s Pajamas

Dead men don’t wear plaid. Right?

In “Family Business,” TNT continues an old “Dallas” tradition: using the Ewings’ sleepwear to telegraph their vulnerabilities.

The practice can be traced to “Spy in the House,” the original show’s third episode, when a sexually neglected Sue Ellen buys a negligee, hoping to arouse J.R.’s interest. Her plan doesn’t work: J.R. calls the nightie “cheap” and storms out of the room, leaving his wife in tears.

In the second-season episode “Survival,” a bathrobe-clad Jock weeps when he learns a plane carrying J.R. and Bobby has crashed. Later, in the third-season episode “Ellie Saves the Day,” Jock and Miss Ellie are both wearing robes when they learn J.R.’s latest oil deal has brought the Ewing empire to the brink of collapse.

And when we encounter a deeply depressed J.R. at the beginning of “Changing of the Guard,” TNT’s first “Dallas” episode, what’s he wearing? You guessed it: a robe and pajamas.

In “Family Business,” Patrick Duffy sports plaid pajamas and what appears to be a dark green robe after Bobby is diagnosed with a life-threatening cerebral aneurysm. The PJs, like the reading glasses perched on Bobby’s nose, remind us our silver-haired hero is entering the twilight of his life – a point Bobby himself makes when he poignantly reminds J.R., “Nobody lives forever.”

But the sleepwear lets us know something else too: Even in pajamas, Patrick Duffy is still dashing.

The Art of TNT’s Dallas: ‘Family Business’

Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) is seen in this publicity shot from “Family Business,” the ninth episode of TNT’s “Dallas.” Photo credit: Zade Rosenthal/TNT.

TNT’s Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘J.R., I Love You’

Dallas, Family Business, J.R. Ewing, Larry Hagman, TNT

Stung

In “Family Business,” a first-season “Dallas” episode, J.R. (Larry Hagman) visits Bobby (Patrick Duffy), who sits in his bed.

J.R.: You could have told me about the cancer.

BOBBY: Slipped my mind. I guess I was too busy trying to undo all the damage you caused.

J.R.: OK, I admit, I have lapses where I do wrong now and then.

BOBBY: No, J.R., your lapses aren’t when you do wrong. Your lapses are when you do right. Like the scorpion who said to the frog, “It’s just in my nature.”

J.R.: Well, you happy with your doctor? Because I’ve given a truckload of money to the UT medical school.

BOBBY: J.R., I love you. No matter what. You remember that.

J.R.: Well, my memory’s not what it used to be, either. You’re just going to have to keep telling me.

BOBBY: Nobody lives forever.

J.R.: Well, I’m not going to stand here and listen to you write your obituary. If you have something to say to me, you say it when they get that thing fixed in your head.

Critique: TNT’s ‘Dallas’ Episode 9 – ‘Family Business’

Dallas, Family Business, J.R. Ewing, Larry Hagman, TNT

The man who came around

“Family Business” offers nothing less than the redemption of J.R. Ewing. In this deeply poignant episode, our aging antihero is called upon to face hard truths and make tough choices, and for once in his life, he does the right thing. By the time the closing credits roll, J.R. has a grown as a person. “Dallas” has grown too.

Rather brilliantly, “Family Business” ends with Johnny Cash’s “The Man Comes Around” playing under a series of chilling scenes that leave the fates of several characters hanging in the balance. J.R. is not among them, but no matter. There’s no doubt the song is meant to evoke the journey he takes in this episode, when one by one, the three people J.R. loves most – John Ross, Sue Ellen and Bobby – persuade him to end the war for Southfork.

These are moving, meaningful scenes. In the first, John Ross pleads with J.R. to give the ranch back to Bobby, prompting J.R. to ask his son, “What’s gotten into you, anyhow?” John Ross’s cutting response: “A little decency.” Later, Sue Ellen storms into the room, slaps J.R. and reminds him how his past schemes left him with “nothing.” When J.R. remains defiant (“Well, I’m back honey, and I’m gonna be bigger than ever.”), Sue Ellen’s exasperation dissolves into pity. “And you still have nothing,” she says.

Only after J.R. speaks with Bobby does he finally, fully see the light. In the scene, Bobby sits in his sickbed and gently admonishes his oldest brother, then tells him, “J.R., I love you. No matter what. You remember that.” J.R.’s face falls – and with it, so do the last vestiges of his bravado. “Well,” he says softly, “My memory’s not what it used to be either. You’re just going to have to keep telling me.”

In each of these scenes, director Michael M. Robin’s clever staging tells us as much as scriptwriter Bruce Rasmussen’s heartfelt dialogue. J.R.’s confrontation with Sue Ellen ends with him standing in front of a mirror that reflects the back of his head, a reminder that there is another side of J.R., even when he can’t see it himself. In the exchange with John Ross, J.R. sits on his bed while the younger man stands over him, symbolizing how the son has achieved moral superiority over the father. In the third scene, the positions are reversed: Bobby is in bed, while J.R. stands. This is when we know J.R., who has always been the big brother, is about to become a bigger man.

Indeed, the next time we see J.R., he is sitting alone in his bedroom, staring at the Southfork deed, a glass of bourbon to his right, his old oil-derrick model to the left. With heavy eyes, he glances at the framed picture of Miss Ellie, sips his drink, puts pen to paper and finally returns ownership of the ranch to Bobby.

The man has come around.

‘He’s J.R. Ewing’

Dallas, Family Business, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, TNT

Scarred inside, too

If there is justice in television, “Family Business” will be the episode that earns Larry Hagman an Emmy next year. The actor is full of wicked charm here, but more than anything, his performance has heart. J.R. has never felt so human.

And while we’re on the subject: Is it too much to ask for Patrick Duffy to receive some Emmy recognition too? I love the sad-eyed, world-weary demeanor he brings to his scenes with Hagman, but Duffy also deserves praise for making Bobby’s seizures look and feel frighteningly real.

Among the younger actors, I’m most impressed by Julie Gonzalo, who knocks me out with Rebecca’s hopeless desperation in “Family Business’s” final scene, when Rebecca turns the gun on Tommy (“Please, please you have to go!”), as well as Josh Henderson, who shows us what John Ross is made of during his character’s confrontation with J.R.

Henderson also shines when John Ross stands in the Southfork driveway and pours out his heart to Elena. “I spent my entire life missing him, wanting to be with him, wanting to be him,” John Ross says of his father. After a beat, he adds: “He’s J.R. Ewing” – letting us know the son’s mistake wasn’t that he failed to live up to his father’s legend, but that he tried in the first place. The “Dallas” makeup artists might be responsible for the cuts and bruises on John Ross’s face, but Henderson gets the credit for showing us the scars his character carries around on the inside.

Other great “Family Business” moments: Christopher reminds John Ross that Bobby was like a surrogate father to him growing up and later proposes going into business with John Ross and Elena – signaling the beginning of an intriguing story arc for the series. Meanwhile, after Harris tries to blackmail Sue Ellen – and mocks her sobriety by pouring her a glass of wine – she confides in Ann her plan to drop out of the gubernatorial race. “I would have made a good governor, don’t you think?” Sue Ellen asks through wet eyes. Has Linda Gray ever been more heartbreaking?

Speaking of Ann: Brenda Strong is wonderful in the scenes that depict her character as devoted wife and friend, but I get the biggest kick out of seeing Ann spar with her wily brother-in-law. I loved J.R. and Ann’s storage barn encounter in “The Price You Pay” and their heated exchange in “Truth and Consequences,” but the “Family Business” scene where she chases him out of Bobby’s room (“Don’t you darlin’ me!”) is the best of the lot. Strong is one of the few actors on the TNT show who can hold her own against the mighty Hagman in every way.

‘Hear the Trumpets, Hear the Pipers’

Dallas, Family Business, Julie Gonzalo, Rebecca Sutter Ewing, TNT

Have gun, will unravel

“Family Business” is a technical achievement as much as anything. Since TNT’s series began, I’ve sometimes struggled to get used to the background music, which is so different from what we heard on the old show. But the new style really works here. Rob Cairns scores several scenes in this episode with sentimental strings, which fit well with the intimate atmospherics.

Of course, “Family Business’s” standout sequence is that Johnny Cash montage. Notice how perfectly his haunting lyrics match what we see on screen. Rebecca pulls the gun out of the safe deposit box as Cash sings, “The hair on your arms will stand up.” Tommy’s face fills the frame when we hear, “Whoever is filthy, let him be filthy still.” Bobby’s monitor flatlines as Cash’s voice booms, “Hear the trumpets, hear the pipers.” And then the punctuation: the ping of the shell casing hitting the counter as blood splatters the stuffed animals Rebecca brought home at the top of the hour.

After I saw this sequence for the first time, I went back and watched it again and again, reveling in how good it is. It reminded me of how I kept “A House Divided,” the episode where J.R. gets shot, on a seemingly endless loop when I was a kid.

But the comparison goes beyond the fact both episodes end with gunshots. The original “Dallas” was never the same after “A House Divided,” and “Family Business” feels destined to become a landmark episode too. I have a hunch we’ll one day look back and remember this as the moment the TNT series became the show we always knew it could be.

Grade: A+

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Dallas, Family Business, TNT

Blood monkeys

‘FAMILY BUSINESS’

Season 1, Episode 9

Telecast: August 1, 2012

Writer: Bruce Rasmussen

Director: Michael M. Robin

Audience: 4.8 million viewers (including 3.2 million viewers on August 1, ranking 17th in the weekly cable ratings)

Synopsis: After Elena discovers a way to extract Southfork oil from a neighboring property, John Ross, Christopher and Elena form a company, Ewing Energies. When Harris tries to blackmail Sue Ellen, she decides to quit the gubernatorial race rather than submit to his scheme. Bobby is diagnosed with a cerebral aneurysm, prompting J.R. to return ownership of Southfork to him. After Bobby learns he may have to incriminate J.R. in the fraud, he suffers a seizure. Tommy is revealed to be working with Frank Ashkani, Cliff’s henchman, who tells Tommy his services are no longer required. Tommy attacks a gun-wielding Rebecca; the weapon fires during their struggle.

Cast: Jordana Brewster (Elena Ramos), Mari Deese (bank manager), Patrick Duffy (Bobby Ewing), Marlene Forte (Carmen Ramos), Julie Gonzalo (Rebecca Ewing), Linda Gray (Sue Ellen Ewing), Larry Hagman (J.R. Ewing), Callard Harris (Tommy Sutter), Josh Henderson (John Ross Ewing), John McIntosh (Dr. Bennett), Jesse Metcalfe (Christopher Ewing), Glenn Morshower (Lou), Kevin Page (Bum), Mitch Pileggi (Harris Ryland), Brenda Strong (Ann Ewing), Tina Parker (nurse), Faran Tahir (Frank)

“Family Business” is available at DallasTNT.com, Amazon.com and iTunes. Watch the episode and share your comments below.

Dallas Styles: Lucy’s Wedding

Sue Ellen’s dress, part 1

Lucy’s wedding in the fourth-season episode “End of the Road, Part 2,” gives the “Dallas” cast a chance to dress up and show off like never before. No one rises to the occasion quite like Linda Gray, who gets to wear two outfits.

When the ceremony begins, Sue Ellen wears a brownish-gray satin dress with shoulders so wide, it makes Gray look like she’s been wrapped in a king-sized bedspread.

… And part 2

This might be intentional. During the reception, a waiter spills a drink on Sue Ellen, and when she retreats to her bedroom to change, she discovers J.R. has been sleeping with Afton – in the same bed he shares with Sue Ellen.

Old-fashioned girl

Until this point, Sue Ellen has been resisting the charms of her old college boyfriend Clint Ogden, a guest at the wedding who has been shamelessly flirting with her. Once she knows J.R. is cheating on her again – and with her “bedspread dress” stained – Sue Ellen apparently decides she has nothing to lose.

She changes into a much different outfit: a form-fitting pinkish-orange garment with three big white flowers printed on the front.

The u-shaped neckline swoops down across Gray’s chest and leaves her shoulders exposed, making this dress much sleeker and sexier than the bedspread. Sue Ellen seems to be letting the world know she’s available again.

Lucy’s wedding gown is also revealing – figuratively, that is. She gets fitted for the dress in “End of the Road, Part 1,” when we learn Miss Ellie wore the gown during her wedding to Jock a half-century earlier.

This seems appropriate. Lucy is a modern girl in almost every sense of the word, but she harbors some pretty outdated ideas about marriage.

In “Start the Revolution with Me,” a later fourth-season episode, Lucy suggests she’d like to drop out of school so she can become a full-time wife to Mitch. At that point, it becomes clear: Lucy didn’t just inherit a wedding dress from the 1930s; she got a Depression era mentality to go along with it.

The Art of Dallas: ‘End of the Road, Part 2’

Lucy (Charlene Tilton) is seen wearing her bridal gown in this 1981 photograph from “End of the Road, Part 2,” a fourth-season “Dallas” episode.

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘He’s a Hell of a Son’

Family business

Family business

In “Dallas’s” fourth-season episode “End of the Road, Part 2,” Bobby (Patrick Duffy) summons Jock and J.R. (Jim Davis, Larry Hagman) to the Southfork living room.

BOBBY: Daddy, I want out of Ewing Oil. It’s all yours, J.R.

JOCK: Just what are you talking about?

BOBBY: I want out. I almost did something today that I never would’ve been able to forgive myself for.

J.R.: Almost? [Walks toward the bar] Does that mean you didn’t sign with Westar Oil? [Pours himself a drink]

BOBBY: So you know about Westar, do you? Well, I can’t say I’m too surprised.

J.R.: [Pouring himself a drink] Well, Bobby, I built Ewing Oil into a power because I knew everything that was happening in Dallas. I still do. That’s how you run a successful business. [Turns to face Bobby and Jock]

BOBBY: Well, maybe you’re right. And maybe you can’t care for the people. [Turns to Jock] But I wanted to run this company on the up-and-up, Daddy. Only after awhile, the deals became more important than the people. I was borrowing from Peter to pay Paul, all the time pretending it was for the right reasons. And then I realized, after awhile, that you can only lie to yourself just so long, that I could pretend that whatever was good for Ewing Oil was alright, but it’s not. It’s not all right for me.

J.R.: Well, if you didn’t sign with Westar, that means you blew the deal with Jordan Lee and the cartel. And on top of that, we still owe them $12 million – money we don’t have.

JOCK: Is that true, Bobby? Did you go back on your word at the cartel?

BOBBY: [Sighs] I hate to disappoint you, J.R., but we’re just fine with the cartel. [To Jock] I phoned Jordan Lee and told him why I couldn’t go in on the deal with him. Then I put him together with Nick Hammond. Hammond Oil? Nick agreed to take over our part of the investment – completely – with the blessing of the cartel. We’re in real solid with them, Daddy. Till they find out J.R.’s back.

J.R.: You’re crazy, Bobby. You lost us millions of dollars.

BOBBY: I’m sure you’ll find a way to get it back. You’re very good at that sort of thing – a lot better than I wanna be. [Turns and leaves]

J.R.: [Turns to the bar] Well, if that don’t tear the rag off the bush. [Pours himself another drink] He almost bankrupts us. He leaves, and I gotta cover his tail. [Chuckles] I tell you. [Drinks]

JOCK: Just what are you talking about, J.R.? Nothing wrong with the company. We got a refinery we didn’t have before. Plenty of product. We’re even back in with the cartel. I’m proud of the way Bobby acted. He showed people the Ewing name stands for something. He’s a hell of a son – and a hell of a man. [Turns and leaves]

Critique: ‘Dallas’ Episode 66 – ‘End of the Road, Part 2’

Big fat Ewing wedding

Big fat Ewing wedding

“End of the Road, Part 2” aired three days after President Reagan’s inauguration, and as if on cue, the episode ushers in a bigger, glossier version of “Dallas.” The show has always been about big things (big homes, big business, big egos), but this hour seems to mark the moment the producers decide even bigger is even better.

This episode’s centerpiece is Lucy’s wedding, which demonstrates how much “Dallas’s” cast has ballooned during the fourth season. In addition to the main characters, the wedding is attended by Alex Ward, Clint Ogden and the Coopers, none of whom were around just a few episodes ago. It’s odd to see these newcomers get so much screen time at a Ewing family event.

To make matter worse, some of the familiar faces act like people we don’t know. I get that Pam feels vulnerable after her mother’s rejection, but would she really allow herself to be tempted by Alex? Likewise, Miss Ellie’s sudden resentment toward Ray feels forced, especially in light of the warm embrace she gave him in “Trouble at Ewing 23.”

It also doesn’t help that the wedding scenes are filmed on “Dallas’s” Hollywood soundstage, which looks even faker than usual. To create the illusion this is a large affair, the producers squeeze dozens of extras onto the set, but this only succeeds in making everyone look claustrophobic. In the scene where Sue Ellen and Clint sit at a table and chat, I find myself worrying the couples on the dance floor are going to waltz right over them.

Yes, there are a handful of nice moments in “End of the Road, Part 2,” including the scene where Jock, J.R. and Bobby duck out of the reception to talk shop in the living room. It evokes the opening of “The Godfather,” when Don Corleone does business on his daughter’s wedding day.

I also like how director Irving J. Moore allows us to hear the murmuring in the crowd when Lucy comes down the aisle (“Look at that dress!”), as well as when he switches perspective and shows the attendees from Lucy’s point of view.

Still, I can’t help but notice how “Dallas” seems to lose a little perspective of its own with this episode.

Grade: B

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Stare and stare alike

Stare and stare alike

‘END OF THE ROAD, PART 2’

Season 4, Episode 12

Airdate: January 23, 1981

Audience: 28.3 million homes, ranking 2nd in the weekly ratings

Writer: Leonard Katzman

Director: Irving J. Moore

Synopsis: Mitch and Lucy marry. During the reception, J.R. sleeps with Afton, while Sue Ellen flirts with ex-boyfriend Clint Ogden. Bobby salvages his big deals but resigns as Ewing Oil’s president.

Cast: Barbara Babcock (Liz Craig), Barbara Bel Geddes (Miss Ellie Ewing), Karlene Crockett (Muriel Gillis), Jim Davis (Jock Ewing), Patrick Duffy (Bobby Ewing), Joel Fabiani (Alex Ward), Anne Francis (Arliss Cooper), Meg Gallagher (Louella), Ted Gehring (Brady York), Linda Gray (Sue Ellen Ewing), Larry Hagman (J.R. Ewing), Susan Howard (Donna Culver), Steve Kanaly (Ray Krebbs), Sherill Lynn Katzman (Jackie), Ken Kercheval (Cliff Barnes), Audrey Landers (Afton Cooper), Monte Markham (Clint Ogden), Leigh McCloskey (Mitch Cooper), Jeanna Michaels (Connie), Victoria Principal (Pam Ewing), Robert Rockwell (minister), Ted Shackelford (Gary Ewing), William Smithers (Jeremy Wendell), Don Starr (Jordan Lee), Charlene Tilton (Lucy Cooper), Joan Van Ark (Valene Ewing)

“End of the Road, Part 2” is available on DVD and at Amazon.com and iTunes. Watch the episode and share your comments below.