Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘I Will Not Allow You to Do This’

Laying down the law

Laying down the law

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “Blackmail,” Miss Ellie (Barbara Bel Geddes) sits at the Southfork kitchen table while Donna (Susan Howard) stands nearby and tells her the story of how Sam Culver and “a partner” staged a land grab by committing the property owner, who later killed himself.

DONNA: I had thought Jock might’ve told you.

ELLIE: Well, why would Jock know anything about it?

DONNA: Because Jock was Sam’s partner, Miss Ellie. It was the beginning of both of their fortunes.

ELLIE: How can you believe such lies about Jock? Of all the men in the world, he would never do that. His first wife ended up in an asylum. He hated them.

DONNA: I understand how you feel.

ELLIE: Oh, no you don’t. You don’t understand anything.

DONNA: Miss Ellie, I would never print anything without your permission. That’s why I came here.

ELLIE: You came to get my permission to destroy the reputation of the finest man that’s ever lived? To tell lies about him, when he’s not here to defend himself? All for the sake of some cheap book? How dare you!

DONNA: [Quivering] I don’t care about the book. I don’t want to hurt you.

ELLIE: Then how could you come and tell me this? It’s not true.

DONNA: It’s true.

ELLIE: It’s not! [Slams fist on the table]

DONNA: [Begins crying] Please, Miss Ellie.

ELLIE: All right. You go ahead and write your book. And the day it’s published, I’ll sue you through every court in the land if I have to. I will not allow you to do this to my husband. [Picks up her eyeglasses and leaves]

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘Two Whole Families Are Involved’

Mama knows best

Mama knows best

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “Vengeance,” Miss Ellie (Barbara Bel Geddes) sits in the living room of Sue Ellen (Linda Gray), who stands nearby.

ELLIE: I want to talk about you. And J.R. And Cliff Barnes.

SUE ELLEN: Miss Ellie, this is quite unlike you to question me about my personal life.

ELLIE: Normally I wouldn’t, but there’s a lot more at stake here than just your personal interest. Two whole families are involved.

SUE ELLEN: I really don’t understand. [Sits across from Ellie]

ELLIE: Well, I’m sure that you know what your seeing Cliff Barnes is doing to J.R.

SUE ELLEN: But that’s J.R.’s problem, not mine. We’re divorced now.

ELLIE: Yes, I know that. But J.R. and Cliff are already at each other’s throats. And it’s beginning to have its effect on too many people.

SUE ELLEN: Are you asking me to stop seeing Cliff?

ELLIE: [Smiles] No. No, I don’t have any right to do that – if you’re serious about him. Are you, Sue Ellen? Or are you using him to get back at J.R.?

SUE ELLEN: Miss Ellie, I really don’t think it’s any of your business.

ELLIE: This thing almost destroyed the three of you once before. Do you think you’re strong enough to handle it again?

SUE ELLEN: I don’t know, Miss Ellie. I really don’t know.

The Dallas Decoder Quiz: First-Season Follies

Bobby Ewing, Dallas, Patrick Duffy, TNT

Yes, we’re sure

TNT’s “Dallas” will begin its second season on Monday, January 28. Take this quiz to refresh your memory of Season 1. The correct answers appear at the end.

1. Which threesome controls the Southfork mineral rights?

a) J.R., Bobby and Gary

b) J.R., Bobby and Ray

c) John Ross, Christopher and Lucy

d) Jack, Janet and Chrissy

2. Which foursome owns Ewing Energies?

a) J.R., Bobby, John Ross and Christopher

b) Bobby, John Ross, Christopher and Elena

c) John Ross, Christopher, Elena and Cliff

d) John Ross, Christopher, Elena and Rebecca

3. Ann secretly recorded ex-husband Harris Ryland confessing to …

a) Counterfeiting

b) Money laundering

c) Murder

d) His commitment to a sanitarium in the early 1990s

Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Jesse Metcalfe, TNT

Wake up call

4. Christopher was shocked when he answered Tommy’s phone and heard whose voice?

a) John Ross

b) Cliff Barnes

c) Frank Ashkani, Cliff’s henchman

d) Becky Sutter, Tommy’s real sister

5. Christopher’s alternative energy technology relies on what natural resource?

a) Methane hydrate

b) Solar power

c) Wind power

d) Linda Gray’s fountain of youth

6. What did Bobby toss in the fireplace?

a) Ann’s locket

b) The Southfork deed

c) The envelope that Harris gave him

d) The painting hanging above it

7. What did Bobby tell Vicente Cano when he visited Southfork?

a) “Get the hell out of my house!”

b) “Help me put the living room and dining room back where they belong!”

c) “Help me birth this calf!”

d) “Wipe your feet!”

Dallas, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes, Rebecca Sutter Ewing, TNT

Daughter of the Alamo

8. Who is Rebecca’s father?

a) Harris Ryland

b) Carlos del Sol

c) Cliff Barnes

d) Tommy’s Uncle Fred

9. What was the real name of the woman who impersonated Marta del Sol?

a) Andrea Barrett

b) Verna Ellers

c) Veronica Martinez

d) Ben Stivers

10. Why did Marta descend from the high-rise balcony?

a) She thought it would be faster than taking the elevator.

b) She jumped.

c) She was pushed by Vicente’s henchmen.

d) She was spooked by Julie Gray’s ghost.

11. Before he died, Elena’s father worked in what industry?

a) Oil

b) Ranching

c) Trucking

d) Cosmetics

Dallas, Elena Ramos, Jordana Brewster, TNT

Debt in the family

12. Who loaned Elena the money to buy the Henderson oil leases?

a) Harris Ryland

b) Vicente Cano

c) Franklin Horner

d) Sue Ellen

13. Who is Clyde Marshall?

a) J.R.’s lawyer

b) Bobby’s lawyer

c) John Ross’s private eye

d) The Dallas County sheriff

14. What is the name of the medical examiner that Sue Ellen blackmailed?

a) Dr. Bruce Rasmussen

b) Dr. Varun Rasmussen

c) Dr. Peyton Hayslip

d) Dr. Mitchell Ackerman

15. What is the full name of Patrick Duffy’s character?

a) Bobby James Ewing – and don’t let anyone tell you differently

Answers: 1) a. 2) b. 3) b. 4) d. 5) a. 6) c. 7) a. 8) c. 9) c. 10) c. 11) a. 12) d. 13) c. 14) b. 15) a.

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Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘My, You’re a Tough Lady’

Yes, she is

Yes, she is

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “The Prodigal,” Roger (Dennis Redfield) is surprised when Pam (Victoria Principal) enters his photography studio.

ROGER: Hi. Did an agency send you?

PAM: No. No, I’m Pamela Ewing, Lucy’s aunt.

ROGER: Oh, my mistake. You’re really lovely. I thought you were probably here for some tests.

PAM: I’ll tell you what I’m here for. I’m here to give you a warning.

ROGER: [Chuckles] A warning? You’re too pretty to give warnings.

PAM: [Steps forward] Cut out the phony charm. And stay away from Lucy. Understand? You took a lot of nice photos, and it was good for both of you. But that’s it. Hands off.

ROGER: My, you’re a tough lady.

PAM: Yes, I am.

ROGER: Alright, let’s be reasonable. [Sits] I’m sorry if I offended anybody.

PAM: I’m not here for an apology. Just stay away from my niece.

ROGER: And if I don’t? What will you do? Sic the Ewing family on me?

PAM: Maybe, but I don’t think I’ll have to. I can take care of people like you myself.

ROGER: Are you threatening me?

PAM: Yes, I guess you might say that.

ROGER: [Menacing] I don’t like threats.

PAM: [Sternly] Well, then consider it a promise. And consider this too: I did you a favor coming here myself this time. But if there’s a next time, you will deal with my husband. [Turns and leaves]

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘Good Luck, Ray’

Used and abused

Used and abused

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “The Maelstrom,” Ray (Steve Kanaly) approaches Bonnie (Lindsay Bloom) at the Longview bar, then leads her to a booth where they sit across from each other.

RAY: I want to straighten a few things out.

BONNIE: Is that middleweight waiting outside?

RAY: Look, I’m sorry about what happened. Honest.

BONNIE: You’re sorry? My jaw is still sore. [Begins to leave]

RAY: Bonnie, let me explain something … about me. I’ve been feeling real down. I still can’t understand all the reasons myself. Let’s just say there were some things in my life I just couldn’t handle. So I figured I’d better get back to where I belong.

BONNIE: With crazy broads like me?

RAY: No, you’re a good person, Bonnie. But you were –

BONNIE: Available?

RAY: Yeah. Bonnie, I tell you. If I can make it work out with Donna, the truth is –

BONNIE: That’s where it’s at for you?

RAY: That’s right. I feel terrible about using our – about using you. It was wrong. I know it.

BONNIE: Listen. You’re wife isn’t one of my favorite people. You understand? But if it can work for you, for keeps … [smiles] then you can’t beat it.

RAY: You mean that, don’t you?

BONNIE: [Leans back] Come on. You don’t think I know the difference between this and something real? What is all this? Musical beds. One-night stands. It adds up to nothing. [Raises her glass] So, here’s hoping you can make it work. Good luck, Ray.

RAY: Thank you, Bonnie. [Reaches across the table, touches her arm]

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘Let’s Haggle Over Your Fee’

Paybacks are hell

Paybacks are hell

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “Adoption,” Donna (Susan Howard), wearing a fur coat, enters the Longview and approaches Bonnie (Lindsay Bloom), who is standing at the bar.

BONNIE: Well, what brings you to the Longview bar? Slumming?

DONNA: I wanted to see what the competition looked like. With clothes on.

BONNIE: Now that you’ve seen me, why don’t you take off? You don’t belong here.

DONNA: I know why you’re trying to steal my husband. He’s a very special man. But I’m here to tell you that you’ve got a fight on your hands.

BONNIE: He doesn’t want you. So why don’t you let him go?

DONNA: Go? You mean go to you? So he can spend the rest of his life in dumps like this? I think he’s worth more than that. No, I want you out of his life and out of mine.

BONNIE: No chance.

DONNA: How much is it going to cost me?

BONNIE: You’re asking for a drink in the face, lady.

DONNA: I’ll give you $5,000 to move to Houston.

BONNIE: You’re crazy.

DONNA: I’ll give you $10,000 if you’ll leave the state. [Bonnie looks away, smirks] How about 15?

BONNIE: [Looking at Donna] Fifteen will do it.

DONNA: Not 10?

BONNIE: Don’t play games with me.

DONNA: Why not? Now that we know what you are, let’s haggle over your fee. [Bonnie tosses a drink in Donna’s face. Donna strikes her, sending her to the floor. As the crowd cheers, Donna pulls out a wad of cash and tosses a bill on the bar.] Drinks are on Bonnie.

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘I Miss You, Sue Ellen’

At last!

At last!

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “Anniversary,” J.R. and Sue Ellen (Larry Hagman, Linda Gray) sit on her sofa and watch a video recording of her appearance in the Miss Texas pageant.

J.R.: Can you imagine that was 14 years ago tonight?

SUE ELLEN: Fourteen years.

J.R.: You haven’t changed a bit. Not to me.

SUE ELLEN: You went to a lot of trouble for that.

J.R.: Oh, just the research.

SUE ELLEN: But why? I don’t understand.

J.R.: Well, I didn’t think you’d remember. But that pageant is where we first met. I was one of the judges. It was the first time I set eyes on you, Sue Ellen. I got the thinking last week, you know, the divorce and everything. Well, you know my alarm clock mind for dates. It just started me thinking about the old days.

SUE ELLEN: Did you? And?

J.R.: I miss you, Sue Ellen. I wanted to be with you tonight. My life just hasn’t been the same without you.

They kiss.

Dallas Desserts: The Barnes-Ewing Holiday Bakeoff

Cliff Barnes, Dallas, J.R. Ewing, Ken Kercheval, Larry Hagman, TNTThe Barneses and Ewings fight all year long. You don’t expect them to take off during the holidays, do you?

This Christmas, Dallas Decoder is honoring Texas’s most famous feuding families with a bakeoff that pits Barnes Fortune Cookies against Ewing Bourbon Balls. The cookies evoke Cliff’s love of Chinese cuisine, while the balls honor J.R.’s favorite drink as well as his, ahem, chutzpah.

(One tip: When creating the fortunes, don’t be afraid to use some of J.R.’s favorite expressions. After all, wouldn’t it be Cliff’s luck to open his cookie and find words of wisdom from his archenemy?)

Both recipes come from my husband Andrew, who blogs about food at Cook In/Dine Out. Andrew also brought us the summertime “Dallas Drinks” cocktails.

So start baking, then tell us which treat you like best in the comments section below. Happy holidays!

Dallas Desserts - The Barnes-Ewing Holiday Bakeoff 2

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘I Got Your Mother to Smile!’

What a smile it is

What a smile it is

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “My Father, My Son,” J.R. and Sue Ellen (Larry Hagman, Linda Gray) talk in her townhouse, while John Ross (Tyler Banks) sits at the kitchen counter, eating.

J.R.: I guess having John Ross around so much, I just don’t know what it’s like without him.

SUE ELLEN: Well, I do miss him on the weekends.

J.R.: [Stands behind John Ross, picking food off his plate] Yeah. I never realized that Southfork was such a big house. It’s so empty there, I tell you.

SUE ELLEN: Really? Well, I thought you were the one that always filled up the house, J.R.

J.R.: [Chuckles] No, this little boy right here is the one that fills up that house. What are you doing today?

SUE ELLEN: Well, I haven’t decided yet. Maybe I’m the one that’ll have the empty house.

J.R.: You don’t have any plans?

SUE ELLEN: There’s a lot of things I could be doing.

J.R.: Oh, yeah, I’m sure there is. I kind of promised John Ross I’d take him to the kiddie park. Would you like to come along?

SUE ELLEN: Oh, uh, no. Thank you.

J.R.: Well, you said you didn’t have anything to do. Come on, Sue Ellen. When’s the last time you sat on a seesaw or had yourself a hot dog? [She smiles.] Lookee there, I got your mother to smile! [Chuckles] We’d both love to have you.

SUE ELLEN: Oh, I don’t know, J.R.

J.R.: Well, if you didn’t enjoy it, I’d drive you home anytime you wanted to. And I think it’d be a good idea for the boy to see his Mama and Daddy together sometime. Just once in awhile.

SUE ELLEN: [Leans across the counter] John Ross, would you like your mama to go with you today?

JOHN ROSS: [Smiling, softly] Yeah.

J.R.: [Laughs] How about that?

SUE ELLEN: I’ll go get my jacket. [Walks away]

J.R.: Well, boy, I tell you, you have a remarkable way of persuading ladies. Just like your daddy, huh?

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘I’m Back, Daddy’

His son, the father

His son, the father

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “The Phoenix,” J.R. (Larry Hagman) enters Jock’s empty office at Ewing Oil, walks slowly around the desk, grips the back of the chair and then steps toward the old man’s portrait.

J.R.: I’m sorry, Daddy. I let you down. I just flat gave up. Back there at that swamp, you were gone. It was all over. It didn’t seem like there was anything worth going on for for me. And I almost forgot: You left us something. You left us the company. You built Ewing Oil from the ground up. And whatever it took, you did it for Ewing Oil. And I’m going to do the same. I’m going to pass it on bigger and stronger to my son. … I’m back, Daddy. And nobody’s going to take Ewing Oil away from me. Or my son, or his son. I swear to you. By God, I’m going to make you proud of me.