The Dal-List: Classic ‘Dallas’s’ 5 Hottest Rolls in the Hay

AnnaLynne McCord, Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Heather, Jesse Metcalfe, Lifting the Veil

Barnburner

The only thing the Ewings love more than a dip in the pool is a roll in the hay. In “Lifting the Veil,” TNT’s most recent “Dallas” episode, Christopher and Heather (Jesse Metcalfe, AnnaLynne McCord) got romantic in the Southfork barn, continuing a tradition that goes back to “Dallas’s” earliest days. Here’s a look at the five hottest hayloft scenes from the original series.

Charlene Tilton, Dallas, James Canning, Jimmy Monahan, Lucy Ewing, Pam Ewing, Victoria Principal

Pammus interruptus

5. Lucy and Jimmy. Lucy (Charlene Tilton) was hot to trot for Camaro-driving Jimmy (James Canning) when he attended a Ewing Barbecue with his Uncle Digger. But as soon as she lured Jimmy to the hayloft, killjoy Pam arrived and told Jimmy he had to take Digger home before he drunkenly belted out any more verses to “The Yellow Rose of Texas” on the dance floor. Pam then hung around the hayloft for some alone time, which turned out be a big mistake: J.R. showed up and tried to mend fences with her, which ended in a different kind of hay roll for poor Pammy.

Dallas, Jenna Wade, Priscilla Beaulieu Presley, Ray Krebbs, Steve Kanaly

Power tools. Grrr.

4. Ray and Jenna. Not long after Jenna (Priscilla Beaulieu Presley) started shacking up with the newly divorced Ray (Steve Kanaly), she went roaming around his house and eventually wound up in the barn, where she found him doing manly Ray things. The next thing you knew, these two were undressing each other in one of the stables. Was it the sight of the shirtless Ray working with power tools that turned on Jenna? Or was this her way of thanking him for taking in her and her two bratty kids? We never found out. Maybe it’s better that way.

Dallas, Dusty Farlow, Jared Martin, Linda Gray, Sue Ellen Ewing

Stacked

3. Sue Ellen and Dusty. Hey, look everyone: Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) is home from the sanitarium — and just in time for the annual Ewing Rodeo. Hooray! How is she going to celebrate her return to Southfork? Well, for starters, she’s going to tell off J.R.’s latest tramp, Mandy, and then she’s going to head over to the barn for a little extra-marital lovin’ of her own with Dusty (Jared Martin). Good plan, Sue Ellen! I suppose it’s kind of shocking to see this uptown lady cavorting in such a down-home setting, but let’s be honest: When Sue Ellen rolls in the hay, she makes it look classy.

Bethany Wright, Dallas, Dallas: The Early Years, J.R. Ewing, Kevin Wixted, Laurette

Virgin territory

2. J.R. and Laurette. “Dallas: The Early Years” is full of historic moments, but the biggest event of all might be when the teenaged J.R. (Kevin Wixted) loses his virginity to his poodle-skirted girlfriend Laurette (Bethany Wright) in the Southfork barn. It’s a kick to see J.R. learning how to charm a lady — he calls her “sugar” and brings along a bottle of beer to get her in the mood — and even though this isn’t exactly the kind of romantic setting we’re used to seeing our hero in, it beats that time he seduced a different floozy (cough, cough Afton) in his own marital bed.

Charlene Tilton, Dallas, Lucy Ewing, Ray Krebbs, Steve Kanaly

Head games

1. Lucy and Ray. “Dallas’s” first roll in the hay is still the kinkest — and the ickiest, in retrospect. On the day Bobby brought home his new bride Pam, Lucy was in the hayloft getting chummy with Ray, who was still carrying a torch for Pam, his ex-girlfriend. Naughty Lucy even made Ray call her by Pam’s name during their encounter, which is pretty darn twisted. Years later, the audience discovered Ray is Lucy’s uncle, which rendered their past relationship into the Storyline No One Dare Speak of Again. Maybe the producers forgot about it, but the fans never did. (Do we ever?)

What’s your favorite “Dallas” hayloft scene? Share your comments below and read more “Dal-Lists.”

Comments

  1. I also liked when Ray caught Charlie and Randy in the barn and beat the crap out of Randy.

  2. I had a roll in the hay with a gal once. A bad mistake as my hay fever & allergies kicked im

  3. Lucy and Ray! One episode later on, when Ray was trying to help Lucy with her pill-popping drug problem, there was one reference to their past relations when Ray told Lucy that they are just going to be friends.

Trackbacks

  1. […] always been part of “Dallas’s” DNA. Isn’t this is the show that began with a teenage girl rolling around in the hay with a silver-haired cowboy? Besides, I don’t find John Ross, Pamela and Emma kissing […]

  2. […] that sex has always been part of “Dallas.” The first episode in 1978 showed the teenaged Lucy rolling around in the hay with silver-haired Ray. “Dallas” went on to break ground in other ways too: Lucy became engaged […]

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