The Best & Worst of Dallas: Season 5

“Dallas’s” fifth season was dandy, save for a few disappointments.

Performances

Barbara Bel Geddes, Dallas, Miss Ellie Ewing

Walk to remember

Barbara Bel Geddes delivers one tour-de-force performance after another as the grieving Miss Ellie. Everyone remembers the scene where Mama smashes the dishes in the Southfork kitchen, but Bel Geddes also shines in quiet moments like the one where Ellie takes that mournful stroll across the ranch. I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating: Bel Geddes can say more with one look than most actors can with a whole script.

Dallas, J.R. Ewing, Larry Hagman

Ewing blues

Runners up: Larry Hagman and Patrick Duffy both break my heart as the brothers Ewing struggle – in very different ways – to deal with Jock’s death (J.R. falls apart, Bobby falls in line). Meanwhile, Linda Gray does a beautiful job conveying Sue Ellen’s conflicting emotions as a recent divorcee. I understand her confusion: It’s nice to see Sue Ellen on her own, but I also want her to reunite with the soul mate she’s left behind at Southfork.

Storylines

I love to watch J.R. scheme his way back into Sue Ellen’s heart. This is another fascinating performance from Hagman, who keeps us guessing about J.R.’s motivation: Does he really love his ex-wife, or is he merely trying to get his hands on John Ross’s Ewing Oil voting shares? My guess is it’s a little from Column A and a little from Column B. One thing is certain: Seeing J.R. pick off Sue Ellen’s suitors (Dusty, Clayton, Cliff), one by one, is a hoot.

Weakest storyline: Pam’s mental breakdown. Victoria Principal does a nice job depicting her character’s despair, but this isn’t the heroic Pam I fell in love with during “Dallas’s” early years. Thankfully, she gets her groove back toward the end of the season, when she lays down the law to creepy Roger and helps Bobby solve the mystery of Christopher’s paternity. And while we’re on the subject: They may not be Nick and Nora, but isn’t it fun watching Bobby and Pam figure out that J.R. didn’t father Christopher? (The season’s best plot twist, by the way.)

Episodes

Adoption, Bobby Ewing, Dallas, Linda Gray, Patrick Duffy, Sue Ellen Ewing

Adopt or cry

“Adoption” is one classic scene after another. Donna socks it to Bonnie. Bobby asks Sue Ellen to sign the affidavit. Sue Ellen tosses the necklace at J.R. and proclaims their relationship is “sick, sick, sick!” This is another great script from Howard Lakin, but don’t overlook Hagman, who sat in the director’s chair for this episode and once again proved he’s as gifted behind the camera as he is in front of it.

My least favorite episode: “The Maelstrom,” in which Lucy discovers Roger’s shrine to her and responds by making love to him. Come on, “Dallas.” Charlene Tilton deserves better. So do we.

Scenes

This is always the toughest category to choose a winner, and Season 5 is no exception. Among the contenders: J.R. and Dusty’s Cotton Bowl showdown, Ellie’s confrontation with the cartel and J.R.’s soliloquy in front of Jock’s painting. In the end, I’m going with “The Search” scene where the Ewing sons break the news to Mama that Daddy isn’t coming home. I don’t know who moves me more here: Bel Geddes, Hagman, Duffy or Steve Kanaly. Beautiful performances all around.

Supporting Players

Afton Cooper, Audrey Landers, Dallas

Hot stuff

No one impresses me as much as Audrey Landers. This is the season Afton breaks J.R.’s grip and comes into her own as one of the show’s heroines. There’s no doubt she deserves a better mate than Cliff, but I love how Afton humanizes him – and you can’t deny Landers’ chemistry with Ken Kercheval. As an added bonus, Landers delivers several hot musical numbers this year, including that sultry rendition of “All of Me” in “The Phoenix.”

Runners up: Morgan Brittany, who debuts in Season 5 as scheming Katherine Wentworth and begins laying the groundwork for the havoc she’ll wreak in later years; Fern Fitzgerald, whose Marilee Stone becomes J.R.’s equal in every way; Barry Nelson as Sue Ellen’s sympathetic lawyer Arthur Elrod; Claude Earl Jones as Wally Hampton, J.R.’s co-conspirator in the plot to sabotage Cliff’s career; and Lindsay Bloom as Bonnie, the sad-sack barfly who beds Ray.

Costumes

Clayton Farlow, Dallas, Howard Keel

Hello, handsome

Virtually every “Dallas” diva sports a fur coat during Season 5, but the full-length number Susan Howard dons during Donna’s barroom brawl is the most meaningful. Among the dudes, no one wears suits better than dapper Howard Keel. I especially love when Clayton shows up at Sue Ellen’s townhouse in pinstripes and an open collar shirt, the same look Josh Henderson often sports on TNT’s “Dallas.”

At the other end of the spectrum: What’s with Sue Ellen’s culottes during Season 5? You get the feeling the character spent every episode standing in front of her closet, trying to decide between skirts and pants and choosing to compromise by wearing both. No wonder she became a politician.

Quips

“You getting good mileage on Donna’s car?” – J.R.’s cheery query to Ray in “Five Dollars a Barrel” cracked me up. Only Larry Hagman could turn a throwaway line into a hilarious putdown.

What do you love and loathe about “Dallas’s” fifth season? Share your comments below and read more “Best & Worst” reviews.

Critique: ‘Dallas’ Episode 97 – ‘The Maelstrom’

Old habits

Old habits

Oh, these Ewing women. How they confound me. Every time it seems like they’re about to find happiness on their own terms, they fall back into frustrating old patterns. This usually means falling back into the arms of men who are no good for them.

In “The Maelstrom,” after Sue Ellen puts the kibosh on reconciling with J.R., she sleeps with Cliff. You can’t blame Sue Ellen for being reluctant to get back together with her ex-husband, but why is she taking up with Cliff again? The last time these two had a fling, things didn’t go well: Sue Ellen wanted to leave J.R. for Cliff, but Cliff dumped her because he feared their affair would ruin his political career. Nice guy, huh? (If you haven’t watched the great scene in the second-season episode “For Love or Money” when Cliff breaks up with Sue Ellen, check it out. Linda Gray will break your heart.)

This time around, Sue Ellen is divorced and Cliff is out of politics, but they’re no better suited for each other now than they were then. It’s pretty clear Sue Ellen only wants Cliff because she knows it will make J.R. jealous. Witness “The Maelstrom” scene where she calls Cliff and, as J.R. listens, tells him how much she enjoyed spending the previous night with him. I also don’t believe for a second Cliff loves Sue Ellen. He’s chasing her for the same reason she’s chasing him: to upset J.R.

Lucy’s latest romance is odder still. Earlier in the fifth season, she sleeps with Roger, the photographer helping her get started in her modeling career, only to decide later she wants to keep their relationship strictly professional. Fair enough. But in “The Maelstrom,” obsessive Roger reveals the shrine to Lucy that he’s built inside his studio, which ought to send her scurrying from the room. Instead, Lucy and Roger fall into a passionate embrace and have sex. Huh?

The absurdity of it all makes “The Maelstrom” one of the season’s weakest entries, but the hour isn’t a total loss. Patrick Duffy, the episode’s director, delivers several clever shots. I especially like how he pans his camera above Charlene Tilton and Dennis Redfield during their love scene and zooms in on one of the glamour shots of Lucy plastering Roger’s wall. Sue Ellen’s shadowy arrival at Cliff’s apartment is also cool, and it’s nice to see Bobby and Ray branding cattle, even if the footage is recycled from the second-season episode “Bypass.”

Speaking of Ray: “The Maelstrom” scene where he breaks up with Bonnie is the episode’s highlight, thanks to sensitive performances from Steve Kanaly and Lindsay Bloom. This feels like a conversation between two people who’ve made bad choices but aren’t necessarily bad people. I also like when Donna calls home and speaks to Ray, who thanks her for sticking with him through his depression. The fact that Donna interrupts Ray while he’s shaving is significant since the stubble he’s worn since “The Search” had come to symbolize the dark cloud that enveloped him after Jock’s death.

J.R. and Katherine’s exchange in “The Maelstrom” also holds up well, and not just because this is the first time master villains Larry Hagman and Morgan Brittany appear together on “Dallas.” In the scene, Katherine, a local TV reporter (she does have a job, you know), is doing person-on-the-street interviews about the Dallas restaurant scene’s recessionary struggles when she comes across J.R., who says the economic downturn hasn’t affected his eating out habits. “My eating in habits haven’t changed much either,” he cracks.

Watching this scene recently, it occurred to me: Three decades after “The Maelstrom” was produced, people are once again watching their wallets when they go out to eat. Who knew an old “Dallas” episode could be so timely?

Grade: C

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Ready for her close up

Ready for her close up

‘THE MAELSTROM’

Season 5, Episode 20

Airdate: February 26, 1982

Audience: 30 million homes, ranking 1st in the weekly ratings

Writer: Will Lorin

Director: Patrick Duffy

Synopsis: Ray sobers up and bids Bonnie farewell. Sue Ellen sleeps with Cliff, upsetting J.R. J.R.’s lawyer informs him the child that Bobby and Pam are adopting might be J.R.’s son.

Cast: Barbara Bel Geddes (Miss Ellie Ewing), Lindsay Bloom (Bonnie), Peter Brandon (Lowell Greer), Morgan Brittany (Katherine Wentworth), Patrick Duffy (Bobby Ewing), Fern Fitzgerald (Marilee Stone), Bruce French (Jerry Macon), Linda Gray (Sue Ellen Ewing), Larry Hagman (J.R. Ewing), Art Hindle (Jeff Farraday), Susan Howard (Donna Krebbs), Steve Kanaly (Ray Krebbs), Howard Keel (Clayton Farlow), Ken Kercheval (Cliff Barnes), Leigh McCloskey (Dr. Mitch Cooper), Pamela Murphy (Marie), Victoria Principal (Pam Ewing), Dennis Redfield (Roger Larson), Debbie Rennard (Sly), Joey Sheck (waiter), Don Starr (Jordan Lee), Charlene Tilton (Lucy Cooper), Deborah Tranelli (Phyllis), Ray Wise (Blair Sullivan)

“The Maelstrom” is available on DVD and at Amazon.com and iTunes. Watch the episode and share your comments below.

Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘But It Was So Beautiful, Cliff’

Never upset this woman

Never upset this woman

In “Dallas’s” fifth-season episode “The Big Shut Down,” Cliff (Ken Kercheval) is in his office at Wentworth Tool and Die, discussing the hospitalized Pam with Rebecca and Katherine (Priscilla Pointer, Morgan Brittany), who’ve dropped by on their way to the airport.

CLIFF: You don’t need to worry about Pam. Mama and I will visit her. Although I must admit: I don’t relish bumping into a Ewing every time we go out there.

REBECCA: Cliff, the only Ewings who ever come to see Pam are Bobby and Ellie.

KATHERINE: [Smiling] I can understand why Pam fell in love with Bobby.

CLIFF: [Snickers] I’m sure you can. I must say, it wasn’t the greatest day in my life.

REBECCA: Cliff, I don’t want a replay of your problems with the Ewings. Besides, if we don’t hurry, we’re going to miss the plane. You know what the traffic’s like on the expressway in the mornings.

As Rebecca speaks, Katherine looks around the room quizzically.

KATHERINE: You know, everything in this office looks so different. I guess because I was three feet high the last time I saw it.

CLIFF: No, I don’t think so. It’s probably because I just had the whole place redecorated.

KATHERINE: Oh, I remember. [Pointing] Daddy had an antique cabinet right there. It was wood with a bold grain, probably oak or something.

CLIFF: Right, you’re right, yeah. I had it moved out because I just like kind of an openness.

KATHERINE: But it was so beautiful, Cliff.

CLIFF: It’s in the storeroom. If you want it, it’s yours.

KATHERINE: [Sighs] No, I’m just surprised you moved it. It always seemed to belong right there. [Smiles icily] Well, Mother, let’s go.

Katherine grabs her purse from a chair and she and Rebecca head for the door.

CLIFF: You all have a safe trip.

REBECCA: I’ll call you later.

After Rebecca and Katherine exit, Cliff surveys the room with raised eyebrows.

Critique: ‘Dallas’ Episode 83 – ‘The Big Shut Down’

Here he goes again

Here he goes again

“The Big Shut Down” is the first “Dallas” episode John Parker has scored since the third season, and it features many of the compositions he created during that era of the show, including Ray and Lucy’s musical signatures and Bobby and Pam’s love theme. It’s always nice to hear these classic numbers, but does the show have to recycle so many old plotlines to go with them?

J.R. spends “The Big Shut Down” conspiring to buy up the oil supply to Clayton Farlow’s refineries so he can hold the crude “hostage” in exchange for John Ross, who now lives with Sue Ellen and the Farlows at their Southern Cross ranch. To finance this scheme, J.R. turns to smarmy banker Vaughn Leland – just like he did two seasons ago, when Vaughn arranged J.R.’s outlandish ploy to secretly mortgage Southfork.

“The Big Shut Down’s” climax – when J.R. signs the paperwork for his loan – even echoes “The Kristin Affair” scene where J.R. approves the deal that puts ownership of Southfork at risk. Both sequences take place in J.R.’s office and both end with him dismissing Vaughn’s ominous warnings. It’s less homage than outright retread.

“The Big Shut Down’s” other subplots feel just as familiar. In “Dallas’s” previous episode, “The Sweet Smell of Revenge,” the show seemed to go out of its way to suggest Pam’s depression wasn’t linked to her fertility problems. But in this installment, Pam is once again bemoaning her inability to have children. In the third act, she even recalls for Dr. Conrad the whole third-season storyline about her obsession with John Ross, reminding us how we’ve seen all this before.

Of course, not everything here is old news. “The Big Shut Down” marks one of the first appearances of Katherine Wentworth, who’ll go on to become one of the great “Dallas” vixens. Morgan Brittany is sublime in the role, right from the start. In this episode, I especially love Katherine’s deliciously bitchy reaction when she discovers Cliff has redecorated her daddy’s old office at Wentworth Tool and Die.

It’s the first time we encounter what becomes one of “Dallas’s” most enduring truisms: Never upset Katherine Wentworth!

Grade: B

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Her too

Her too

‘THE BIG SHUT DOWN’

Season 5, Episode 6

Airdate: November 13, 1981

Audience: 23.7 million homes, ranking 1st in the weekly ratings

Writer: Arthur Bernard Lewis

Director: Leonard Katzman

Synopsis: Vaughn agrees to finance J.R.’s plot to cut off the Farlows’ oil supply. Jeff Farraday, the mysterious caller who contacted Bobby, sells him more information about Christopher. Pam meets Katherine. Donna steps in as Ray’s partner when Punk drops out of their latest venture.

Cast: Phillip Allen (Lloyd Bettinger), Tami Barber (Bev), Barbara Bel Geddes (Miss Ellie Ewing), Deborah Benson (secretary), Morgan Brittany (Katherine Wentworth), Patrick Duffy (Senator Bobby Ewing), Tom Fuccello (Senator Dave Culver), Robert  Ginnaven (Chuck Williamson), Linda Gray (Sue Ellen Ewing), Laurence Haddon (Franklin Horner), Larry Hagman (J.R. Ewing), Art Hindle (Jeff Farraday), Susan Howard (Donna Krebbs), Steve Kanaly (Ray Krebbs), Howard Keel (Clayton Farlow), Ken Kercheval (Cliff Barnes), Audrey Landers (Afton Cooper), Leigh McCloskey (Mitch Cooper), Dennis Patrick (Vaughn Leland), Priscilla Pointer (Rebecca Wentworth), Victoria Principal (Pam Ewing), Debbie Rennard (Sly), Charlene Tilton (Lucy Cooper), David Tress (Walter Sher), Edward Winter (Dr. Frank Waring), Morgan Woodward (Punk Anderson), Gretchen Wyler (Dr. Dagmara Conrad)

“The Big Shut Down” is available on DVD and at Amazon.com and iTunes. Watch the episode and share your comments below.

Dallas Parallels: Counterfeit Correspondence

In the most intense scene in “Changing of the Guard,” TNT’s first “Dallas” episode, Christopher angrily accuses Elena of exposing flaws in his methane hydrate project. She fires back by calling him out for dumping her – via e-mail! – on the day they were supposed to be married.

“I never sent you an e-mail!” Christopher exclaims. “I waited for you. For six hours! I thought you were dead, Elena. I was calling hospitals. I called Southfork. And when I finally got together with my father, he said you were in Mexico. And the next time I saw you, you had hooked up with John Ross!”

So begins one of the biggest mysteries of the new “Dallas’s” first season: Who sent the e-mail that broke up Christopher and Elena? The storyline produces more than a few twists, and as the Dallas Redone blog noted in June, it also evokes memories of another pair of star-crossed Southfork lovers who were kept apart by counterfeit correspondence.

During the classic “Dallas’s” seventh season, baby Christopher’s newly separated parents, Bobby and Pam, were on the verge of reconciling when they encountered interference from another relative: Pam’s conniving half-sister Katherine, who forged a letter in which Pam told her lawyer she no longer wanted to be married to Bobby but would return to Southfork to avoid hurting him.

Katherine, hoping to snare her sister’s husband for herself, showed Bobby the letter, knowing it would prompt him to give Pam the divorce he believe she wanted. The ploy worked and Bobby and Pam were kept apart.

In “Hush, Hush, Sweet Jessie,” the penultimate episode of “Dallas’s” seventh season, the truth finally came out. In a quiet, moving performance from Victoria Principal, Pam pours out her heart and tells her ex-husband she never wanted to end their marriage. The revelation confuses Bobby, who reminds Pam what she had written in the letter to her lawyer.

“What letter?” Pam asks.

The conversation is interrupted by a ringing telephone – symbolic, perhaps, of the bells going off in Pam’s mind. At the end of the episode, she confronts Katherine (played to wicked perfection by Morgan Brittany), who brazenly confesses to her forgery – prompting Pam to smack her so hard, Katherine falls onto a nearby bed.

Flash forward three decades: In “Truth and Consequences,” TNT’s fifth “Dallas” episode, after Christopher pulls Rebecca aside at the Ewing barbecue, she tells him Tommy sent the e-mail that broke up him and Elena – which leads to Christopher striking Tommy in front of the other guests.

Like Pam’s smackdown, Christopher’s punch offered a satisfying flash of catharsis for viewers who knew Tommy was secretly plotting against the Ewings. It also reminded us: The Ewing men may have a lot in common with their daddies, but sometimes they take after their mamas.

 

‘What Letter?’

What letter?

In “Hush, Hush, Sweet Jessie,” a seventh-season “Dallas” episode, Pam (Victoria Principal) stands at a window in her living room while Bobby (Patrick Duffy) rests on the arm of a sofa.

PAM: I laid awake most of the night, just thinking. Thinking about how sad everything is. There have been so many tragedies in the past couple of years. Mama’s dying. Now Mark’s dying. Our marriage breaking up. Sometimes I just can’t believe that we’re divorced. I don’t know, Bobby. We should have found some way to have made it work.

BOBBY: I don’t disagree with that.

PAM: I thought a lot about our splitting up. It wasn’t just your fault or the Ewings’ fault. A lot of it was my fault too. You don’t know this, but I came to Thanksgiving Square that day to tell you that I was ready to try again.

BOBBY: Try? Try what, getting back together?

PAM: Yes.

BOBBY: Well, that’s very strange. I was sure you didn’t want to.

PAM: Oh, Bobby, I wanted to. I always wanted to. I just didn’t know if I could. [Walks toward him, they sit together on the sofa] Anyway, before I could say anything, you told me that you were letting me go.

BOBBY: But that’s because of your letter.

PAM: What letter?

BOBBY: The letter that you wrote to your lawyer. Maybe it was a first draft or something. Maybe you didn’t even send it. But Katherine found it and read it to me. It wasn’t the easiest thing I ever listened to.

PAM: Do you remember what was in it?

BOBBY: You said you wanted out of the marriage. You didn’t want to divorce me. You were afraid it would hurt me. You were hoping that I’d let you go.

In the background, a telephone rings.

PAM: Katherine read you this letter?

BOBBY: Yes. And despite how I felt at the time, it made me realize you wanted a different life.

 

‘I Never Sent You an E-mail!’

What e-mail?

In “Changing of the Guard,” the first episode of TNT’s “Dallas,” Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) angrily leads Elena (Jordana Brewster) into a room at Southfork and slams the door behind them.

CHRISTOPHER: You couldn’t wait to tell him.

ELENA: What?

CHRISTOPHER: About the methane. The earthquake. Everything I told you in confidence, you told John Ross!

ELENA: I don’t know what you’re talking about.

CHRISTOPHER: [Grips her arms] Don’t lie to me!

ELENA: [Pushes him away] Let go.

CHRISTOPHER: Don’t lie to me!

ELENA: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

CHRISTOPHER: John Ross tried to blackmail me. He said he was going to tell my father everything.

ELENA: I didn’t tell him anything.

CHRISTOPHER: And what you did? What you did was for nothing. Because he doesn’t love you. He uses people. And you want to know what’s really sick? I trusted you again.

ELENA: [Slaps him] John Ross doesn’t love anyone but himself? You look in the mirror, Christopher. You listen to your own words. I will always love you. [Crying] But we are two different people, from two different circumstances. I hope you understand. Was I really so wrong for you?

CHRISTOPHER: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

ELENA: The e-mail you sent me. The day we were supposed to get married.

CHRISTOPHER: I never sent you an e-mail! I waited for you. For six hours! I thought you were dead, Elena. [Crying] I was calling hospitals. I called Southfork. And when I finally got together with my father, he said you were in Mexico. And the next time I saw you, you had hooked up with John Ross! So what was I supposed to think?

ELENA: You sent me an e-mail saying that we were a mistake.

CHRISTOPHER: What?

ELENA: I only went to Mexico because I couldn’t stand to be here. John

Ross found me. I thought I wasn’t good enough.

CHRISTOPHER: No. [Touches her face] No. Don’t ever say that.

What do you think of Pam and Christopher’s moments of truth? Share your comments below and read more “Dallas Parallels.”

The Dallas Decoder Guide to That Darned Barnes Family

Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Jesse Metcalfe, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes Ewing, Revelations, TNT

Pamela redux

The Barneses are back: In “Revelations,” the first-season finale of TNT’s “Dallas,” we learned Rebecca Sutter Ewing is Pamela Rebecca Barnes, Cliff’s daughter. Need a refresher on the rest of the Barneses? Here’s a look at who’s who, how they’re related to each other and the Ewings and some of their family traditions, including their penchant for interesting headgear and shooting people. Also listed: the actors who portrayed the characters on the two “Dallas” series.

The Elders

Dallas, David Wayne, Digger Barnes, Keenan Wynn

Double Diggers

• WILLARD “DIGGER” BARNES: Boozy wildcatter who claimed Jock Ewing cheated him out of his share of Ewing Oil and stole his girl, Miss Ellie. Liked hats. Remembered for two deathbed confessions: 1. He shot and killed wife Rebecca’s lover, Hutch McKinney; 2. McKinney was Pam’s real dad. Played by David Wayne and Keenan Wynn.

Dallas, Priscilla Pointer, Rebecca Barnes Wentworth

Runaway Rebecca

• REBECCA BARNES WENTWORTH: Digger’s wife and Cliff and Pam’s mama. After lover Hutch McKinney’s murder, ran away, became a secretary and married her boss, Houston tycoon Herbert Wentworth. Was believed dead for many years until Pam found her. Died (for real this time) from injuries sustained in a plane crash while waging corporate warfare against the Ewings. Favorite candy: black licoricePlayed by Priscilla Pointer and Victoria Principal (in a flashback).

Cliff’s Corner

Cliff Barnes, Dallas, Ken Kercheval

Presto-chango

• CLIFF BARNES: Digger and Rebecca’s son. Inherited mama’s money and daddy’s genetic disorder, hatred for Ewings. Unfortunate tendencies to pursue women involved with archenemy J.R., marry blondes to snag a piece of Ewing Oil. Frequent career-changer: lawyer-turned-politician-turned-bureaucrat-turned-prosecutor-turned-oilman-turned-evil mastermind. Regularly accused of murder and shooting Ewings, but known to have killed only one man: mobster Johnny Dancer. Sharp dresser. Favorite food: Chinese. Favorite activity: revenge. Played by Ken Kercheval.

Afton Cooper, Audrey Landers, Dallas

Steal her away

• AFTON COOPER: Sexy southern songbird who dreamed of a better life. Seduced J.R., then fell for Cliff. In-law to the Ewings: brother Mitch married and divorced Lucy, then married and divorced her again. After longing for someone to steal her away, Afton finally left town on her own carrying Cliff’s child, whom she named Pamela Rebecca. Married and divorced alcoholic gambler/con artist Harrison Van Buren III. Despite questionable taste in men, probably the smartest character among this bunch. Played by Audrey Landers.

Dallas, Jenna Pangburn, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes, TNT

Daddy’s girl

• PAMELA REBECCA BARNES: Cliff and Afton’s daughter. Like Aunt Katherine, broke up a relationship with forged correspondence (an e-mail). Like Aunt Pam, married a Ewing (Christopher). Like Granddaddy Digger and Daddy Cliff, shot and killed a man (ex-lover/fake brother/hat wearer Tommy Sutter). Pregnant with Ewing spawn. Played by Julie Gonzalo. Previously played by Jenna Pangburn.

Dallas, Faran Tahir, Frank Ashkani, TNT

Daddy’s boy

• FRANK ASHKANI: Real name: Raheed Durani. Cliff’s right hand/driver/designated disposer of dead bodies. Not a fan of Tommy Sutter. According to J.R.’s private eye Bum, Cliff plucked Frank off the streets of Islamabad 30 years ago and paid for his fancy education, nice wardrobe and – presumably – frequent trips to the barber. Sometimes referred to as “Smiling Frank.” Doesn’t actually smile. Played by Faran Tahir.

Pam’s Portion

Dallas, Margaret Michaels, Pam Ewing, Victoria Principal

Pam-o-rama

• PAMELA BARNES EWING: Daughter of Rebecca Barnes Wentworth and lover Hutch McKinney; raised by Digger and Aunt Maggie Monahan. Super heroine. Suffered bouts of mental instability and at least one 31-hour nightmare. Occasional wearer of hats. Bad driver. Like her mama, abandoned her own family. Probably dead, but hopefully not. Played by Victoria Principal, Margaret Michaels and at least one heavily bandaged extra.

Bobby, Dallas, Patrick Duffy, TNT

Ewing-in-law

• BOBBY EWING: Golden son. Fell in love with Pam and thought she was so nice, married her twice. Usually a supportive spouse, but not always. Not a fan of brother-in-law Cliff in the beginning, but eventually became his pal and made him a partner in Ewing Oil. The lingering warmth will probably fade when Bobby discovers Cliff is once again plotting against the Ewings. Additional potential complicating factor: new wife/gun fetishist Ann may or may not have had a one-night stand with Cliff in 1987. Played by Patrick Duffy.

Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Jesse Metcalfe, Joshua Harris, TNT

Half-breed

• CHRISTOPHER EWING: Golden son’s golden son. Adopted, making marriage to cousin Rebecca Barnes only slightly less icky than it might be otherwise. May not have Barnes blood coursing through his veins, but inherited the family’s gun habit: as a boy, Christopher shot at John Ross. Dream meal: eggs and toast. Played by Jesse Metcalfe. Previously played by Eric Farlow and Joshua Harris.

The Wentworth Wing

Dallas, Katherine Wentworth, Morgan Brittany

She’s all hat

• KATHERINE WENTWORTH: Herbert and Rebecca Wentworth’s daughter. Television journalist/Christopher’s babysitter/ultimate diva. Hated Cliff. Not a big Pam fan, either: wanted Bobby for herself, so Katherine broke up his first marriage to Pam with a forged letter. Later shot him. Known for visiting sick relatives in hospital and making threatening comments/trying to kill them while they sleep. Most amazing hat collection ever. Disliked tomato juice. Played by Morgan Brittany.

Monahan Members

Dallas, James Canning, Maggie Monahan, Philip Levien, Sarah Cunningham

The lost ones

• AUNT MAGGIE MONAHAN and COUSIN JIMMY MONAHAN: Maggie was Digger’s long-suffering sister who helped raise Cliff and Pam. Rocked hats with the best of them. Her son: Jimmy, the Chuck Cunningham/Judy Winslow of “Dallas.” After two appearances in 1978, never seen nor mentioned again. Aunt Maggie was played by Sarah Cunningham; Cousin Jimmy was played by James Canning and Philip Levien.

What do you remember about the Barneses? Share your comments below and read more “Dallas Decoder Guides.”

Drill Bits: TNT’s ‘Dallas’ Finale Draws a Crowd

Dallas, Linda Gray, Revelations, Sue Ellen Ewing, TNT

Still a crowd pleaser

TNT’s “Dallas” went out with a bang: “Revelations,” the first-season finale, scored 4.3 million viewers on August 8, becoming the evening’s most-watched cable program. The audience included 1.6 million viewers between the ages of 18 and 49, the demographic advertisers covet.

The show soared despite stiff competition from NBC’s Olympics coverage, which drew 29 million viewers, including 12 million 18-to-49-year-olds.

The “Revelations” audience represented “Dallas’s” third biggest Wednesday haul since the first two episodes, “Changing of the Guard” and “Hedging Your Bets,” averaged 6.9 million viewers on June 13. “The Price You Pay” delivered 4.8 million viewers on June 20.

Overall, “Dallas” averaged 4.2 million viewers – and 1.4 million 18-to-49-year-olds – on Wednesdays this summer. When DVR users who record the show and watch it later are counted, the show’s weekly audience climbs to 6.4 million viewers.

Production is slated to begin next month on “Dallas’s” second season, which TNT will begin showing in January. The cable channel has announced plans to produce 15 episodes in Season 2, up from 10 hours this year.

Rebecca Redux

Changing of the Guard, Dallas, Julie Gonzalo, Rebecca Sutter Ewing, TNT

Full of surprises

When I wrote my “Revelations” critique this week, I figured we’d have to wait until “Dallas’s” second season to find out who the heck Julie Gonzalo is playing.

Wrong.In a new interview with TV Guide, executive producer Cynthia Cidre reveals Gonzalo is, in fact, portraying Pamela Rebecca, the daughter we learned Cliff fathered toward the end of the original show’s run.

Also in this must-read interview, Cidre reflects on the show’s first season (“a few too hairpin turns,” she says), reveals plans to add Elena’s brother Drew to the cast and drops the tantalizing suggestion that we might see a John Ross/Rebecca coupling.

Meanwhile, Gonzalo tells TV Line she knew her character’s real identity all along – and found it difficult to be coy when meeting fans of the original series. “‘They’d say, ‘Why else would your name be Rebecca?’ and I had to be like, ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about….’”

Honoring ‘Dallas’ History

In another insightful interview, “Dallas” executive story editor Gail Gilchriest says the TNT show’s writers have a better handle on the original series’ history.

“This year, we’re more familiar with who’s who, and what’s happened in the past, and have tried to remain pretty true to it,” Gilchriest tells the CultureMap Houston site. “We don’t pretend that certain things in the original series didn’t happen if it doesn’t serve our story.”

Katherine Speaks

Speaking of history: Our pal David, the creator of Dallas Divas Derby, recently interviewed Morgan Brittany, who immortalized Katherine Wentworth on the original “Dallas.”

In one of two segments David posted this week, Brittany speculates about what the future might hold for her villainous character. “At some point, she would get back at Cliff Barnes. Some way, somehow, she’s going to get even with Cliff,” Brittany says.

Look for more segments from David’s interview in the coming days – and someone tell Cliff to watch out for Katherine!

Still Standing

In the early 1980s, when the producers of the original show needed a stand-in for Patrick Duffy, they turned to Dallas model Paul Heckmann.

Three decades later, when TNT came to North Texas to shoot the new “Dallas,” who did they tap to stand in once again for Duffy? You guessed it: Heckmann, who was profiled this week in the Dallas Morning News.

Oh Baby!

“Dallas” diehards are intense: Josh Henderson tells the New York Daily News he was recently asked to sign a fan’s baby. “I felt really weird and so I was like, ‘Can I just sign her dress or shirt?’ And they were like, ‘No just sign her arm.’”

Line of the Week

“You know you’ve hit a low when even a lawyer won’t take the time to insult you.”

J.R. (Larry Hagman), after legal eagle Lou (Glenn Morshower) snubs him in “Revelations.” And in case you missed it: We’ve collected many of J.R.’s best quips from TNT’s first season, along with memorable lines from “Dallas’s” other characters.

Along Came a Cider

The final “Dallas Drinks” cocktail recipe from Cook In/Dine Out is Cynthia Cider, which pays tribute, of course, to Cidre, the new show’s creative force.

This is as good a place as any to acknowledge my husband Andrew, who not only created all nine “Dallas”-themed cocktail recipes for Dallas Decoder – he also puts up with my incessant chatter about the show and this website.

Honey, I love you and appreciate your support. Thank you.

“Drill Bits,” a roundup of news about TNT’s “Dallas,” is published regularly. Share your comments below.

Drill Bits: TNT’s ‘Dallas’ Wrangles Big Audience

Ann Ewing, Brenda Strong, Changing of the Guard, Dallas, Linda Gray, Sue Ellen Ewing, TNT

Reason to celebrate

The June 13 debut of TNT’s “Dallas” drew 6.9 million viewers, becoming the year’s most-watched premiere of a cable drama or comedy. The audience included a healthy 1.9 million viewers between the ages of 18 and 49, the group advertisers pay a premium to reach.

“Dallas’s” two-hour premiere drew more viewers than any program on the broadcast networks between 9 and 11 p.m. and made TNT the evening’s most-watched basic cable channel.

Also worth noting: “Dallas’s” opening night drew a bigger crowd than the first episodes of other top cable dramas, including “Mad Men” (1.65 million viewers in 2007), “Breaking Bad” (1.35 million, 2008) and “Walking Dead” (5.3 million, 2010).

Yes, “Dallas’s” 6.9 million number is nowhere near the 83 million viewers who saw the old show’s most-watched episode: “Who Done It?”, the 1980 broadcast that revealed the identity of J.R.’s shooter. But c’mon, there were only three networks back then!

Comparing TNT’s two-hour premiere to other episodes from the original “Dallas” series is trickier. In those days, Nielsen usually counted the number of households that watched television, not individual viewers.

For example, the fourth-season episode “No More Mister Nice Guy, Part 2,” the old show’s second highest-rated broadcast, was seen in 31.1 million homes. “Dallas’s” lowest-rated episode, “Fathers and Sons and Fathers and Sons,” which aired during the final season, was seen in 8.9 million homes, ranking 52nd for the week.

And in case you’re wondering, “Digger’s Daughter,” the original “Dallas’s” first episode, was seen in 15.7 million homes, ranking 18th in the weekly ratings, while “Conundrum,” its 1991 finale, was seen in 20.5 million homes, ranking 2nd.

Metcalfe’s Favorite Scenes

Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Jesse Metcalfe

Jesse speaks

In my “Changing of the Guard,”critique, I praised Jesse Metcalfe’s terrific performance in the scene where Christopher and Elena finally come clean with each other on the day of his wedding to Rebecca.

When I spoke to Metcalfe during a conference call with bloggers last month, he told me he likes that scene, too. So does he have favorite moments from other episodes?

“I probably have a favorite moment from every episode,” Metcalfe said. “It’s really difficult for me to pick just one scene. I mean, the fun thing about this show is that it’s a magnificent ensemble.”

We agree!

‘Dallas,’ Then and Now

How does “Digger’s Daughter,” “Dallas’s” first episode from 1978, compare to “Changing of the Guard,” the first hour of TNT’s “Dallas” series?

• First line of dialogue

1978: “Bobby James Ewing, I don’t believe you!” (Pam)

2012: “John Ross, wake up!” (Elena)

• Saltiest language

1978: “You jackass!” (Jock)

2012: “It’s bullshit!” (John Ross)

• J.R. loves red …

1978: Files

2012: Jell-O

• Bobby’s reason to celebrate

1978: A wedding!

2012: A birthday!

• Words spoken by Sue Ellen

1978: 38

2012: 120 (approximate)

• Get a room! (But not that one!)

1978: Lucy and Ray in the hayloft

2012: Christopher and Rebecca in the locker room

• Last line of dialogue

1978: “Well, I surely won’t do that again.” (J.R.)

2012: “The fun is just beginning.” (John Ross)

Line of the Week

“You are still the prettiest girl at the ball.”

There were a lot of great lines in the back-to-back “Dallas” episodes TNT telecast June 13, but if I had to pick a favorite, it was J.R.’s parting words to Sue Ellen at the end of their long-awaited reunion in “Hedging Your Bets.”

In the first episode of “Dallas Round-Up,” TNT’s post-show webcast, “Dallas’s” executive producer and head writer Cynthia Cidre revealed the line was suggested by another of the show’s writers, Robert Rovner.

When Rovner pitched the line to her and the other writers, “we all got misty-eyed,” Cidre recalled.

Diva Declared

The arrival of TNT’s “Dallas” wasn’t the only big event in the Ewing-verse this week: A few hours before the show debuted, Katherine Wentworth was crowned the winner of the Dallas Divas Derby race.

David W., whom I interviewed last month, created the derby, which pitted 32 of the original show’s heroines and villainesses against each other in a two-month brackets-style competition. The final race came down to Katherine (Morgan Brittany) and Sue Ellen (Linda Gray); when all was said and done, Katherine received 2,494 votes, or 424 more than Sue Ellen.

Be sure to also check out David’s insightful review of the TNT series, as well as his sentimental introductory post, in which he recalls his childhood love of “Dallas.”

Get Your Drink On

A reminder: This week, my husband Andrew and I began offering “Dallas Drinks,” a series of cocktails inspired by the characters on the TNT show. First up: The John Ross; we’ll post another recipe next week.

Be sure to visit Andrew’s blog, Cook In/Dine Out, too. As you’ll see, he’s an amazing cook. Heck, he could probably teach Carmen Ramos (Marlene Forte) a thing or two!

“Drill Bits,” a roundup of news about TNT’s “Dallas,” will be published regularly. Share your comments below.