Dallas Burning Questions: Season 2, Week 9

Don’t blame him

Don’t blame him

Here are the questions we’re pondering as we await tonight’s telecast of “Guilt and Innocence,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode.

Who survives the blast? At the end of “Ewings Unite!,” last week’s episode, most of the Ewings gathered on the methane extraction rig, along with Pamela and Elena (Julie Gonzalo, Jordana Brewster), for a demonstration. Little did everyone know the platform was rigged with explosives, which detonated moments before the screen faded to black. It’s a safe bet the core characters will survive, but I’m not sure we can say the same thing about Pamela’s unborn twins. One clue: Pamela’s mother Afton (Audrey Landers) will appear in tonight’s episode, possibly to console her grieving daughter. If Pamela loses one or both of the babies, how will it affect her relationships with ex-husband Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) and ex-lover John Ross (Josh Henderson)?

Can Cliff be redeemed? The story behind the explosion, part 1: At the beginning of last week’s episode, Cliff and Harris (Ken Kercheval, Mitch Pileggi) joined forces to bring down the Ewings. Cliff promised to give Harris the money he needs to gain control of Ryland Transport from Judith (Judith Light), while Harris agreed to help Cliff undermine Ewing Energies. Harris’s henchman Roy Vickers (Alex Fernandez) arranged to have the bomb planted under the platform, but when Pamela unexpectedly showed up, he called Cliff and gave him a chance to back out. Remarkably, Cliff told Vickers to proceed with the detonation. How will Cliff live with himself after this?

Will Drew forgive himself? The story behind the explosion, part 2: Drew (Kuno Becker) reluctantly planted the bomb after being blackmailed by Vickers, who threatened to kill Elena if Drew refused to do his bidding. Until then, things had been looking up for young Drew: Bobby (Patrick Duffy) agreed to sell him the Ramos family’s land and Drew went on a promising date with Emma (Emma Bell). What will happen if his role in the explosion is discovered?

Will Christopher be blamed? The Ewings were on the platform to demonstrate its potential to local government official Alison Jones (Annie Wersching), hoping it would seal their deal to land the city’s lucrative fuel contract. Getting Alison to the platform took a lot of work: When Cliff tried to steal the contract at the last minute, John Ross and Christopher teamed to blackmail Alison into rejecting his bid. Last season, Christopher’s methane extraction technology was plagued by suspicions it was unsafe. Will the bombing raise fresh doubts?

Will Sue Ellen sober up? J.R.’s will split his share of the Southfork mineral rights between John Ross and Sue Ellen (Linda Gray), who shifted into denial mode about her alcoholism, insisting she didn’t need Gary’s help to stop drinking. After Valene (Joan Van Ark) confronted her, Sue Ellen urged Gary (Ted Shackelford) to return to his wife, telling him she needs to reclaim her sobriety on her own. Will she?

• More questions: Now that John Ross has inherited half of Southfork, will he take up residence at the ranch, perhaps moving into his father’s old bedroom? Did Judith survive her tumble down the stairs? And will we finally get some more clues to the biggest question of all: Who killed J.R.?

What “Dallas Burning Questions” are on your mind? Share your comments below and watch TNT’s “Dallas” tonight.

TNT’s Dallas Scene of the Day: ‘Once a Bitch, Always a Bitch!’

Dallas, Ewings Unite, Joan Van Ark, Valene Ewing, TNT

Birdwatching

In “Ewings Unite!,” a second-season “Dallas” episode, Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) is seated at her office desk when Valene (Joan Van Ark) storms in and slams the door behind her. 

VAL: Once a bitch, always a bitch!

SUE ELLEN: Yes, it has been a long time. It’s good to see you too.

VAL: You just called me to Dallas to humiliate me. You are just as sadistic as J.R. ever was.

SUE ELLEN: I called to see if I could get you and Gary back together again.

VAL: Oh, please! [Steps forward] Gary is buying your wounded bird drunk routine. And he’s a good enough man to try to save you. But I know that you’re just trying to get your hooks into him.

SUE ELLEN: I don’t want your husband.

VAL: [Rests her palms on the desk] He may not come back to me. But I can promise you: I am not leaving Southfork until I show him what a manipulative monster you are. [Stomps away]

Critique: TNT’s ‘Dallas’ Episode 19 – ‘Ewings Unite!’

Cliff Barnes, Dallas, Ewings Unite, Ken Kercheval, TNT

The twist

There’s a lot to like about “Ewings Unite!,” including Ken Kercheval’s chilling performance in the final scene and the sensational, old-school soap opera showdown between Joan Van Ark and Linda Gray, which is destined to become a “Dallas” classic. Unfortunately, this episode also gives us plenty to lament. Valene’s eagerly awaited reunion with Gary never really happens, there’s seemingly little movement in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery, and the bombshell dropped during J.R.’s will reading is silly. This production isn’t just missing the old Hagman magic. Logic has taken a holiday too.

The will reading offers a welcome cameo from the wonderful Barry Corbin, who portrayed Sheriff Washburn on the old “Dallas” and appears here as J.R.’s lawyer. Bruce Rasmussen’s script honors J.R.’s mischievousness by having him leave a bottle of scotch to recovering alcoholic Gary, while Bobby inherits J.R.’s collection of cowboy boots. (This might be an inside joke. Hagman memorably called cowboy boots “the most uncomfortable mode of transport ever invented.”) I’m not going to complain about the omission of absent characters – a full recitation of J.R.’s bequests could have consumed half the episode – but I will gripe about the big surprise: It seems Miss Ellie waited until after J.R.’s death to leave half of Southfork to John Ross.

Ellie’s explanation comes in a letter read by Corbin’s character: “My son J.R. was many things, but he was not a rancher. That’s why I left my beloved Southfork to Bobby. But I hope you understand, Bobby, that J.R.’s sins should not be visited upon my grandson, John Ross.” Come again, Mama? As much as I like the idea of Ellie one-upping J.R. from beyond the grave, this defies belief. Set aside the fact that Ellie and second husband Clayton deeded Southfork to Bobby toward the end of the original series. In the new “Dallas’s” timeline, she left the ranch to Bobby upon her death more than a decade ago. Now Ellie is able to change those terms? I’m no lawyer, but how is this legally possible?

If the show’s goal is to pit John Ross against his uncle – effectively allowing John Ross to take his father’s place in this franchise’s central conflict of J.R. versus Bobby – then I’m all for it. I also like the idea that John Ross’s stake in the ranch means he’ll probably take up residence at Southfork, which I hope will set the stage for more old-fashioned Ewing family gatherings. Still, I wonder: Couldn’t the show have achieved this new power structure without sacrificing its credibility?

“Ewings Unite!” also suggests Cliff’s company, Barnes Global, is a rebranded version of the old Barnes/Wentworth conglomerate he ran on the old show. This also seems to contradict established “Dallas” lore – didn’t Cliff long ago relinquish his stake in those companies? – but I can live with this change since the composition of his corporate assets always seemed needlessly confusing. I’m more bothered by the revisionism in Elena’s storyline. When she challenges Christopher over his blackmail scheme, she declares, “This is why I wanted out of the company.” Whoa! Didn’t Sue Ellen oust Elena from the company against her will? Never mind the old show; if the new “Dallas” isn’t going to respect its own history – and by “history,” I mean stuff that happened three episodes ago – why should we?

The resolution of Gary’s mini-arc and Val’s return yield more mixed feelings. Van Ark is a hoot in the scene where Val confronts Sue Ellen (“Once a bitch, always a bitch!”), a marquee battle between two of television’s greatest soap queens. This doesn’t feel much like the Val I remember, but I like the idea that Van Ark’s character has grown stronger and more confident. “Poor Val” appears to be a memory. I also adore Ted Shackelford’s final scene with Gray, when Sue Ellen sweetly urges Gary to return to his wife before it’s too late. “One day she may be gone and you don’t want to regret the loss of every moment you could have spent with her,” Sue Ellen says. It’s a nice reminder of the wisdom Sue Ellen has gained, as well as the fact that her devious behavior in this episode stems from her grief.

But as much as I appreciate these moments, I want to shake my fist at “Dallas” for not giving us a scene where Gary and Val patch things up. Talk about a missed opportunity. Shackelford and Van Ark are every bit as iconic as “Dallas’s” other famous pairings. To split up the couple is one thing; to only give them a brief appearance together in the Southfork foyer and then leave the fate of their marriage unknown is something else. (So much for engendering goodwill among “Knots Landing” fans.) Of course, if the lack of closure means Gary and Val will return next season to resume their storyline, I’ll be the first to eat these words.

I don’t mean to dwell on my disappointments with “Ewings Unite!” There’s plenty here to admire, including seeing John Ross and Christopher work together; the scene where they gang up on Pamela showcases the nice chemistry between Josh Henderson and Jesse Metcalfe, who play off each other almost as easily as Hagman and Patrick Duffy did during “Dallas’s” heyday. I also appreciate Christopher’s flirtation with the dark side, and how the scene where Elena learns about his blackmail scheme echoes one from the old show where Pam tries to bring Bobby back from the edge. Other highlights include the pairing of impressive newcomers Kuno Becker and Emma Bell, as well as the addition of Annie Wersching, who I hope will stick around as sexy, scheming city transportation official Alison Jones.

More good stuff: the scene where Cliff and Harris form their Legion of Doom-style alliance, as well as when Harris dismisses his new partner in crime as a “paranoid old coot” while speaking to Vickers, who is poised to succeed Frank as this show’s go-to henchman. As far as Cliff’s decision at the end of episode to blow up the Ewing Energies rig, even though pregnant Pamela is on board: I wasn’t that shocked. The version of Cliff we see on TNT’s “Dallas” is more twisted and consumed than the one we remember. Like a lot of longtime fans, I wish I knew how Cliff got this way. Still, as ugly as his actions are, they seem perfectly in tune with the person he’s become.

Regardless, how fantastic is Kercheval in that scene? Everything about the actor’s body language – the fidgety hands, the shifty eyes – suggests the torment raging within Cliff in that instant. I also appreciate how director Steve Robin heightens the drama with a glimpse of pregnant Pamela’s belly before the bomb goes off, as well as the shot of Vickers kissing the cross around his neck before he pushes the detonation button.

I’m more surprised to see “Ewings Unite!” spend so little time on the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery, which got off to such a riveting start at the end of the previous episode. After Bobby fills in John Ross and Christopher on the origin of Cliff’s company, he suggests J.R. was searching for Pam because she might be a “silent partner” in Barnes Global and casually reveals that Katherine is dead. Then again, as Dallas Decoder readers have pointed out, this show usually doesn’t mention older characters unless they’re going to figure into the storyline. Could Bobby’s reference to Katherine be the first step toward bringing Morgan Brittany to the new “Dallas”? Who knows? We might look back on this episode one day and realize it offers the biggest clue of all.

Grade: B

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dallas, Ewings Unite, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, TNT

Inherit the earth

‘EWINGS UNITE!’

Season 2, Episode 9

Telecast: March 18, 2013

Writer: Bruce Rasmussen

Director: Steve Robin

Audience: 2.7 million viewers on March 18

Synopsis: J.R.’s will splits his share of the Southfork mineral rights between Sue Ellen and John Ross. A letter from Miss Ellie reveals John Ross will become co-owner of the ranch with Bobby. When Bobby decides to resume drilling on Southfork, Sue Ellen, who is still drinking, summons Valene to take Gary home. Cliff tries to undermine Ewing Energies’ bid for the city fuel contract, but John Ross and Christopher blackmail transportation official Alison Jones into giving them the contract. Judith threatens to oust Harris at Ryland Transport, then falls down the stairs. After Cliff and Harris join forces, Harris’s henchman Roy Vickers blackmails Drew into sabotaging the Ewing Energies methane extraction rig. Cliff orders Vickers to blow up the rig, even though it will endanger Pamela and the Ewings.

Cast: Kuno Becker (Drew Ramos), Emma Bell (Emma Brown), Jordana Brewster (Elena Ramos), Barry Corbin (J.R.’s lawyer), Patrick Duffy (Bobby Ewing), Alex Fernandez (Roy Vickers), Julie Gonzalo (Pamela Barnes), Linda Gray (Sue Ellen Ewing), Josh Henderson (John Ross Ewing), Jesse Metcalfe (Christopher Ewing), Kevin Page (Bum), Mitch Pileggi (Harris Ryland), Ted Shackelford (Gary Ewing), Brenda Strong (Ann Ewing), Charlene Tilton (Lucy Ewing), Joan Van Ark (Valene Ewing), Annie Wersching (Alison Jones)

“Ewings Unite!” is available at DallasTNT.com, Amazon.com and iTunes. Watch the episode and share your comments below.

Drill Bits: After J.R.’s Funeral, ‘Dallas’s’ Ratings Dip

Ann Ewing, Bobby Ewing, Brenda Strong, Dallas, Ewings Unite!, Patrick Duffy, TNT

Back to normal

“Dallas” lost almost all of the extra viewers it picked up during J.R. Ewing’s funeral last week.

“J.R.’s Masterpiece,” the sendoff for Larry Hagman’s iconic character, was seen by 3.6 million viewers on March 11. It was the TNT drama’s most-watched telecast this year, beating the show’s second-season average by about 1 million viewers.

The latest telecast, “Ewings Unite!,” scored 2.7 million viewers on March 18. This audience included more than 1 million viewers between ages 18 and 49, a demographic that advertisers pay a premium to reach.

A ratings decline was expected. Television series often get a boost from “milestone” episodes, and the death of J.R. – whom Hagman began portraying in 1978 – fit the bill.

Meanwhile, the audience for “J.R.’s Masterpiece” continues to grow. Within a few days of the episode’s March 11 telecast, DVR users had pushed its audience to 4.6 million viewers, a 26 percent increase from the previous week’s episode. When DVR users are counted, “J.R.’s Masterpiece” averaged 1.8 million adults between ages 25 and 54, an audience that TNT targets, and 1.5 million adults between 18 and 49.

TNT has not announced whether it plans to renew “Dallas” for a third season. The cable channel renewed the show for a second season two days after the third telecast.

Austin to Dallas

I haven’t seen next week’s episode of “Dallas,” but I’m calling it now: The highlight will be Lee Majors’ guest appearance as Ken Richards, one of Sue Ellen’s old flames. (Well, that and the return of Audrey Landers as Afton Cooper.)

As regular readers of Dallas Decoder know, “The Six Million Dollar Man” was my other favorite show growing up, so you can imagine how excited I am to have Col. Steve Austin visit “Dallas.” You can also imagine how thrilled I was to interview Majors a few weeks ago. If you haven’t already checked out our chat, please do so.

Derby II

Dallas Divas Derby, a March Madness-style brackets competition that pits the women of “Dallas” against each other, is back for more fun. The most recent round ended earlier this week with victories for Elena Ramos (Jordana Brewster), who beat Jenna Wade (Priscilla Presley) in a matchup between “The Outsiders,” and Pamela Rebecca Barnes (Julie Gonzalo), who defeated Serena Wald (Stephanie Blackmore) in a showdown between “The Setup Queens.” Voting in the next round will end Monday, March 25.

Drinking Drew

If you’re a fan of Kuno Becker’s performance as Drew Ramos, be sure to check out The Drew, the latest addition to Cook In/Dine Out’s “Dallas Drinks” collection. Like Mr. Becker, this drink is hot stuff!

“Drill Bits,” a roundup of news about TNT’s “Dallas,” is published regularly. Share your comments below.

‘Who Killed J.R.?’ More Questions, Few Answers

Cliff Barnes, Dallas, Harris Ryland, J.R. Ewing, Ken Kercheval, Larry Hagman, Mitch Pileggi, TNT, Who Killed J.R.? TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode, “Ewings Unite!,” offered a few potential clues in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery – but not many. Here’s what I think we know.

J.R. was searching for Pam. At the end of “J.R.’s Masterpiece,” Bum (Kevin Page) told Bobby, John Ross and Christopher that J.R. had been looking for Christopher’s “mother” before his death. Since Bum didn’t specify which mother, I suggested J.R. wasn’t necessarily on the trail of Pam (Victoria Principal), the mom who adopted Christopher and later abandoned him and Bobby. My left-field theory: J.R. was hunting Christopher’s biological mom Kristin (Mary Crosby). Yes, I know she supposedly drowned in the Southfork swimming pool, but hey, this is “Dallas.”

In “Ewings Unite!,” we seem to receive confirmation that Pam was the target of J.R.’s search after all. This happens when Bobby (Patrick Duffy), while filling in the Ewing cousins on the history of Cliff’s company, holds a stack of papers and says, “This is a summary of the financial reports for Barnes Global, dating all the way back to its inception, when it was started by Cliff’s mother. Now she divided that company up between the three children: Pamela, Cliff and Katherine. Katherine’s dead. So if Pamela’s still alive, she could be a silent partner in Barnes Global. Maybe that’s why J.R. was looking for her – to help us take Cliff down.”

Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) responds: “If my mother’s alive, I’ll find her. It’s about time I did.”

Bobby’s history lesson isn’t exactly how I remember the origin of the old Barnes/Wentworth empire, but setting that aside for a moment, this scene seems to offer two things: a) confirmation that J.R. was indeed trying to find his old nemesis Pam, and b) Bobby’s theory that J.R. wanted Pam to help him stop Cliff.

In other words: There’s no reason, at this point, to believe Kristin is anything but dead.

The list of suspects is taking shape. In addition to Kristin, the list I posted last week of eight potential suspects included Katherine (Morgan Brittany), who I figured would want J.R. dead because she’s still holding a grudge against the Ewings. Now that we know Katherine is dead, she comes off the list too. (Presumably Katherine’s demise occurred sometime between the end of the original “Dallas” and the beginning of TNT’s revival.) Is it possible she’s still alive and Bobby doesn’t know it? Sure, but there’s no evidence to support that one either.

I also think we can drop the Ewings’ disgruntled lawyer, Mitch Lobell (Richard Dillard), from the list of suspects, since no one has mentioned him and he was a long shot to begin with. And even though I’m still suspicious of J.R.’s friend Carlos del Sol (Castulo Guerra) – who, we learn in “Ewings Unite!” is investigating Harris’s Mexican trucking operation on Bobby’s behalf – there’s no reason to consider him a suspect at this point either.

This leaves three chief suspects, beginning with Cliff (Ken Kercheval), who wouldn’t seem capable of killing J.R. – until now. In the chilling finale of “Ewings Unite!,” Cliff orders Harris’s henchman Roy Vickers (Alex Fernandez) to blow up the Ewing Energies methane extraction rig – even though Cliff knows the blast might harm his pregnant daughter Pamela (Julie Gonzalo). If Cliff is willing to risk his own flesh and blood, why wouldn’t he be willing to take out J.R.?

The second suspect: Harris (Mitch Pileggi), who joined forces with Cliff in “Ewings Unite!,” just like J.R. predicted in his note to John Ross (Josh Henderson). I still don’t know why Harris would have a beef with J.R., unless he believed getting rid of him would leave Bobby and Ann vulnerable to attack. I doubt the “Dallas” producers will have Harris turn out to be J.R.’s murderer, though, even if his altercation with mother Judith (Judith Light) at the end of “Ewings Unite!” suggests a violent streak.

The third and final suspect: J.R. Yes, I know: It’s unlikely Larry Hagman’s iconic character would arrange his own death, even if it turned out to be part of an elaborate scheme to set up Cliff, Harris or one of his other enemies. But I keep coming back to a point I made last week: Who else on “Dallas” is big enough to take down J.R. Ewing – except J.R. himself?

There’s still a lot we don’t know. “Ewings Unite!” opens with the reading of J.R.’s will, in which John Ross somehow inherits half of Southfork from Miss Ellie and John Ross and Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) split J.R.’s share of the ranch’s lucrative mineral rights. You might think an inheritance this huge would make John Ross or Sue Ellen suspects in J.R.s death, but c’mon, that would be nuts. The new “Dallas” producers wouldn’t go that far, would they?

“Ewings Unite!” doesn’t shed much light on the other clues in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery. In addition to the discovery that J.R. was searching for Pam, “J.R.’s Masterpiece” also ended with Bobby receiving a mysterious document from his deceased brother. In “Ewings Unite!,” John Ross refers to the document as “a letter,” but Bobby declares he won’t reveal its contents until J.R.’s master plan is implemented. “Because that’s the way he wanted it,” Bobby says.

We also still don’t know what to make of the gun that J.R. left for John Ross. While watching “Ewings Unite!,” it occurred to me: Could this be the gun that Kristin used to shoot J.R. all those years ago? If so, might it signal her eventual return? Uh oh, here I go again!

Who done it? Share your theories below and read more posts on Dallas Decoder’s “Who Killed J.R.?” page.

Dallas Burning Questions: Season 2, Week 8

Oh, mama!

Oh, mama!

Here are the questions we’re pondering as we await tonight’s telecast of “Ewings Unite!,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode.

Who killed J.R.? In “J.R.’s Masterpiece,” last week’s episode, the Ewings learned J.R. was shot and killed in a cheap hotel in Nuevo Laredo, Mexico. The police investigation concluded he was a robbery victim, but Bobby (Patrick Duffy) knew better. For more, check out my list of eight potential suspects, as well as the five burning questions surrounding “Dallas’s” latest mystery. Who do you think is responsible for J.R.’s death?

What’s in J.R.’s will? It isn’t clear what J.R.’s estate includes, but this much we know: the Southfork mineral rights were split equally among him, Bobby and Gary (Ted Shackelford). The surviving brothers recently joined forces to suspend pumping oil out of the ranch, which is part of Bobby’s effort to oust Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) from Ewing Energies. Now that J.R. is gone, who will inherit his share of the mineral rights and how will it affect the battle over the company?

Will Sue Ellen recover? In the aftermath of J.R.’s death, Sue Ellen continued to cozy up to Gary, hoping he’d side with her in the fight for Ewing Energies. Her ambition offended John Ross (Josh Henderson), who told her, “My father’s barely cold and you’re talking about already going to seduce his brother? Could you at least pretend to mourn him for five minutes?” Little did John Ross know how much his mother was hurting: On the night before J.R.’s funeral, she broke down and got drunk, then confessed her relapse during her eulogy for her ex-husband. Will Sue Ellen get the familial support she’ll need to climb back onto the wagon?

Will Gary and Val reconcile? It’s unlikely anything lasting will come of Sue Ellen and Gary’s flirtation since “Ewings Unite!” marks the end of Shackelford’s three-week guest stint on “Dallas.” Also, keep in mind: Tonight’s episode brings back Joan Van Ark, who’ll reprise her iconic role as Valene, Gary’s now-estranged wife, and Charlene Tilton, who’ll make another appearance as Lucy, their daughter. The question is: Will Gary and Val leave Southfork together or separately?

Will Bobby and Ann make up? J.R.’s death put additional stress on Bobby, who lashed out at Ann (Brenda Strong) for keeping so many secrets from him during their marriage. When she apologized and asked what she could do to “make things right,” he turned away. Meanwhile, Harris (Mitch Pileggi) arrived at Southfork in his sleek Lamborghini and pleaded with Emma (Emma Bell) to come home with him. When she refused, Harris told Ann, “Tell your husband that he has no idea what he started.” What will Harris do?

How will Emma shock us next? Speaking of Emma: That girl has gone wild! During J.R.’s memorial service, she ducked into a cloakroom and popped pills with John Ross. Later, they shared a bottle of booze and retreated to the backseat of a car, where he, um, welcomed her to the family. But John Ross isn’t the only man in Emma’s life: When Harris tried to persuade her to leave Southfork, Drew (Kuno Becker) helped Ann run him off the ranch. Could Drew be next on Emma’s hit list?

Is Pamela fed up with Cliff? When John Ross spotted Pamela (Julie Gonzalo) at J.R.’s memorial, he criticized her for reneging on her promise to share her piece of Ewing Energies. “John Ross, please. I care about you,” Pamela said. His response: “The only thing you care about is yourself.” Later, when Cliff (Ken Kercheval) showed up at the memorial, ranting and raving about the Barnes/Ewing feud, Pamela made him leave. “Daddy, that’s enough. Let’s go,” she said. Between Pamela’s feelings for John Ross and her anger at Cliff, could she be rethinking her role in the Barnes/Ewing feud?

• Who’s minding the store? We haven’t heard much about Ewing Energies since “The Furious and the Fast,” when the company-sponsored racecar scored a big victory at the track. This prompted flirty transportation official Alison Jones (Annie Wersching) to hint Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) will be awarded the contract to fuel the city’s municipal fleet. Meanwhile, with Elena (Jordana Brewster) out of a job, Drew persuaded her to help him drill their father’s land, although first they need to buy it back from Bobby. Will he sell?

What “Dallas Burning Questions” are on your mind? Share your comments below and watch TNT’s “Dallas” tonight.

The Dallas Decoder Guide to Valene Ewing

Another reunion

Another reunion

Valene Ewing (Joan Van Ark) will be reunited with her in-laws in “Ewings Unite!,” tonight’s episode of TNT’s “Dallas.” Val appeared occasionally on the original “Dallas” and was the heroine of its “Knots Landing” spinoff, but how much do you remember about her? Here’s a refresher.

There goes the neighborhood

There goes the neighborhood

Val loves Gary. Val was waitressing in a diner when handsome Gary Ewing (Ted Shackelford) walked in and sat down. “What will it be?” Val asked him. Gary’s response: “I don’t know. What does a man in love eat for lunch?” It was a cute beginning for what became television’s most tortured love story. During the next half-century, Val and Gary had three weddings, three children and more crises than you can count, including alcoholism (his), multiple personality disorder (hers) and staged deaths (theirs). Now the couple faces one of their greatest challenges yet: Sue Ellen’s flirtation with Gary!

And teddy makes three

And teddy makes three

All her children. Val and Gary are the parents of Lucy (Charlene Tilton), whom Jock and Miss Ellie raised after J.R. drove Val and Gary away from Southfork. Lucy grew up angry with her parents for abandoning her, but the family reconciled after a few therapeutic splashes in the Southern California surf. Meanwhile, Val and Gary went on to have two more kids: twins Bobby and Betsy, although for awhile they were kidnapped and Val believed they were dead. Hey, that gives her something in common with her new sister-in-law Ann Ewing. They should share a muffin sometime.

Mr. Dreamy

Mr. Dreamy

Val’s favorite brother-in-law: Bobby. Oh, Bobby! Dear, sweet Bobby (Patrick Duffy). Val could always count on him. When she was estranged from Lucy, who arranged a mother/daughter reconciliation? Bobby, of course. He also reunited Val and Gary, discovered the house on Seaview Circle that became their home and rode to Val’s rescue when she had a cancer scare. Is it any wonder Val always seemed to look at Bobby with dreamy eyes? Hey, if Sue Ellen can have a fling with Gary, why can’t Val get a little something going on with Bobby? On second thought, cancel that muffin with Ann.

Mr. Nightmare

Mr. Nightmare

Least favorite brother-in-law? Take a guess. Val was always one of the kindest, most pure-hearted members of the Ewing family – except where J.R. (Larry Hagman) was concerned. Over the years, she called him “disgusting,” “a troublemaker” and “a vile, evil man.” J.R. declared she was a “tramp,” “a wimp,” and “southern trash.” You weren’t really surprised that Val skipped his funeral, were you? Remember what she told Gary in 1980, after finding out that J.R. had been shot: “If J.R. was dead, I honestly couldn’t mourn him.” Harsh? Perhaps, but at least it shows Val is a woman of her word.

That’s not a gun, is it?

That’s not a gun, is it?

Aiding and comforting the enemy. After Kristin (Mary Crosby) shot him, J.R. exiled her to California, where she wound up on Gary and Val’s doorstep. Val allowed Kristin to stay with them despite Gary’s objections, which turned out to be perfectly justified. Within days of her arrival, Kristin wrecked the marriage of neighbors Kenny and Ginger Ward. When Val confronted her, Kristin confessed that she was pregnant and scared, although she didn’t reveal that the child was J.R.’s. It was a reminder of what makes Val so special: Only as someone as nice as Val could get someone as devious as Kristin to reveal her softer side.

Author! Author!

Author! Author!

The original gossip girl. Val wasn’t just television’s first desperate housewife, she was also its original gossip girl. She wrote a novel inspired by the Ewings called “Capricorn Crude,” although J.R. struggled to get the title right. Here’s J.R. meeting Joe Cooper, Val’s editor: “You know, there’s been rumors flying all around Dallas about a book called ‘Corn Crude’ or ‘Crude Porn’ or ‘Corn Pone.’” Joe: “‘Capricorn Crude.’” J.R.: “Yeah, that’s it!” When J.R. declared he was “tickled” about Val’s literary success, he wasn’t kidding. He bought the publishing company – not to shut down the book, but to reap the profits.

Step off, Abby

Step off, bitch

Val always gets her man. Here’s the most important thing you need to know about Val: She always triumphs over husband-stealing hussies. Yeah, Abby Cunningham (Donna Mills) snagged Gary – but only for a little while. He came back to Val eventually, didn’t he? The same thing happened after his relationships with every woman in his life, including Jill Bennett, Kate Whittaker and “Sally’s friend” (long story). And don’t forget about Ciji Dunne! When she got too close to Gary, Val pushed her so hard she hit her head on a coffee table and was knocked out. In other words: Watch your back, Sue Ellen!

What do you remember about Valene Ewing? Share your comments below and read more “Dallas Decoder Guides.”

Dallas Drinks: The Drew

To honor Kuno Becker’s performance on TNT’s “Dallas,” Dallas Decoder and Cook In/Dine Out offer a Drew Ramos-inspired “Dallas Drinks” cocktail.

Dallas Drinks - The Drew

‘Who Killed J.R.?’ 5 Questions Surrounding ‘Dallas’s’ Mystery

Bobby Ewing, Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Jesse Metcalfe, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, Patrick Duffy, TNT, Who Killed J.R.?Every “Dallas” fan has one thing on his or her mind: “Who Killed J.R?” Before the mystery is solved, a few other questions must be addressed. Will the answers lead us to one of the eight potential suspects I named earlier this week?

1. Why was J.R. in Mexico? In “J.R.’s Masterpiece,” this week’s “Dallas” episode, we learned our hero was shot and killed in a flophouse in Nuevo Laredo, Mexico. According to the policewoman who investigated the crime, J.R. entered the country to go quail hunting. Later, his private eye Bum (Kevin Page) told Bobby, John Ross and Christopher that the quail hunt was a cover: J.R. was actually following a lead in his scheme to bring down Harris Ryland (Mitch Pileggi), the Texas trucking magnate who specializes in driving the Ewings crazy.

What business would Harris have in a place like Nuevo Laredo? The policewoman told the Ewings that the local drug cartels have started reaching out to “successful businessmen across the border for advice.” Bobby (Patrick Duffy) insisted J.R. would never do business with the cartel, and we don’t doubt him. Harris, on the other hand, might be the type to get mixed up in the illegal drug trade. After all, didn’t he try last season to blackmail Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) into laundering money for him?

2. Why was J.R. looking for Pam? Before J.R. entered Mexico, he went to Abu Dhabi to close an oil deal. But as Bum explained to Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe): “The reason he chose Abu Dhabi was because for the last several months, he’s been trying to find your mother.” Bobby’s stunned reaction: “You mean Pam?” Bum didn’t respond to Bobby; instead, he handed Christopher a document and said, “J.R. thought that once you’d seen this, you’d understand why it’s important for you to find your mama.”

Let’s pause here to remember that Christopher had two mommies: Kristin Shepard (Mary Crosby), his biological mother, who famously shot J.R. in 1980 and later drowned in the Southfork swimming pool, and Pam (Victoria Principal), Bobby’s first wife, with whom Bobby adopted Christopher after Kristin’s death. Assuming Kristin is really dead and that she isn’t the missing mama that J.R. was trailing, the question becomes: Why in heavens would J.R. want to find Pam, his longtime nemesis?

Some theories from Dallas Decoder readers: J.R. figured Pam, who abandoned Bobby and Christopher after she was badly burned in a fiery car crash, is the only person who might be able to talk her brother Cliff Barnes (Ken Kercheval) into finally ending his war against the Ewings. Or perhaps J.R. found evidence that Cliff had somehow bilked an unwitting Pam and/or Christopher out of their rightful share of the fortune they inherited from Pam and Cliff’s rich mother Rebecca Wentworth. (Could such evidence be included in the document that Bum handed Christopher?) Or maybe the aging J.R., seeking immortality, wanted to find Pam because he knew of her ability to dream dead Ewings back to life.

Whatever the reason, if Christopher resumes Uncle J.R.’s search and ends up finding Pam, don’t expect her to look like Principal. Earlier this month, as rumors swirled that Pam might return to “Dallas,” Principal issued a statement suggesting she will never resume the role.

3. Why did J.R. give John Ross a gun? After Bum handed Christopher the document about his mother, he gave John Ross (Josh Henderson) a box that contained J.R.’s gun. It came with this note:

“John Ross, if you’re reading this, it means I’m dead. And if I’m dead, that means Barnes is coming after you. You must crush him before he can win. I promised your Uncle Bobby that taking down Harris Ryland would be my masterpiece. I’d bet my last nickel Barnes will join forces with Ryland to destroy us. Use what I’ve given you to take from them what they want to take from us. When you’ve done that, Bobby will know what to do. And remember: You’re my son, tip to tail.”

Perhaps the most revealing thing about J.R.’s note isn’t his prediction that Cliff and Harris will join forces; it’s that J.R. wrote it in the first place. He knew his life was in danger, although this doesn’t necessarily rule out the theory that J.R. arranged his own death so it could be pinned on one of his enemies. If you buy that theory, you might think this is the gun that was used to kill J.R. But keep in mind: The coroner who examined J.R.’s body said he was killed with a “Saturday night special,” and that’s not the kind of gun John Ross received. On the other hand: Medical examiners on “Dallas” aren’t the most trustworthy people, are they?

4. Who is Lady X? When J.R.’s friend Carlos del Sol (Castulo Guerra) visited Southfork to update the Ewings on the investigation, he explained J.R. met a woman in a club near the hotel where he died. “Not your professional sort of lady, mind you, but there are witnesses to their assignation,” Carlos said. According to the policewoman who accompanied Carlos to the ranch, this mystery woman – let’s call her “Lady X” – asked J.R. to meet her near her workplace, which is how he wound up in the Hotel Colon. A witness saw someone follow J.R. to the hotel, but that person could not be found, the policewoman said.

So who is Lady X? Could she be one of the women I named as suspects earlier this week? Did she intentionally lead J.R. to the hotel, knowing he would be killed there? Did she pull the trigger herself? Does she really exist? Or did Carlos invent her because he’s involved in the killing and wanted to throw the Ewings off his trail?

5. What does Bobby know? Of course, despite what Carlos and the policewoman told the Ewings, we know J.R. was not the victim of a robbery. After Bum distributed J.R.’s “gifts” to John Ross and Christopher, he gave Bobby a sealed envelope. Bobby opened it, read the document it contained and walked out of the room, dismissing John Ross and Christopher’s plea for more information. “This is between my brother and me – for now,” Bobby said.

Outside the room, Bobby told Bum to “pay off whoever you have to pay off so that everybody still thinks J.R. was killed by a mugger. When the time comes, we’ll take care of this ourselves – as a family.” Bobby then walked into J.R.’s room, noticed the framed wedding photograph of J.R. and Sue Ellen, poured himself a glass of bourbon, sat on the bed and said: “I knew you’d have at least one more left up your sleeve, J.R.” He glanced at the document in his hand, half-smiled and continued: “It is a good one. I love you brother.”

So what did Bobby learn? During the “Dallas” cast’s panel discussion last week, Duffy revealed the show’s producers told him who shot J.R. so he would know how to play certain scenes, including this one. So whatever the document reveals, it holds a big clue to the identity of J.R.’s killer. I have my own theory, but for now, I’d rather hear yours. What do you think it says?

Who done it? Share your theories below and read more posts on Dallas Decoder’s “Who Killed J.R.?” page.

The Dallas Decoder Interview: Lee Majors

Lee Majors

Lee Majors (Photo by Dana Patrick)

Lee Majors is coming to “Dallas”! Majors, the iconic star of “The Six Million Dollar Man” and “The Fall Guy,” will begin a multi-episode guest stint on the TNT drama on Monday, March 25. (DVR alert: Majors will also appear on Fox’s “Raising Hope” later that week.) I was honored to speak to him recently about what it’s like to tangle with the Ewings.

Let me begin by telling you I that had two childhood obsessions growing up: The first was “Dallas,” but the second was “The Six Million Dollar Man.”

Oh, you put me in second place?

Well, actually, you came first because your show came first. So I spent a lot of my childhood running around the backyard in slow motion making the bionic sound effect.

As long as you didn’t jump off a barn or something and break anything.

No, never tried that.

I’ve heard that story before.

Oh, I’m sure you have. So tell me: How did you get the role on the new show?

I think Larry [Hagman] did it.

The Man

The Man

No kidding. How did that happen?

Well, Larry and I were friends for many, many years. We lived a couple of doors down from each other in Malibu. We used to see each other all the time on the weekends when we were both trying to recover from our week of work. And when TNT picked up “Dallas” for a second season, I was surprised because he gave me a call and said, “Lee, guess what? They picked us up and for 15 [episodes]!” He was like a little kid. He said, “You’ve got to do one.”

Oh, wow.

So I said, well, if it happens, it happens. I didn’t hear from him for awhile because we weren’t neighbors anymore, but he did text me about a month before he passed away and said, “I’m working on it.”

Wait, J.R. Ewing sent Steve Austin a text?

Yeah. All it said was, “I’m working on it.” I assumed he meant the show. So while I was at Larry’s memorial, I ran into Michael Robin, the exec producer, and he said, “Yeah, Larry mentioned you.” And I said, “That was sweet of him.” And that was about it, and then a month later, my agent got a call about availability. So I kind of point to the sky and say, “Thank you, Larry. Thank you, J.R.”

What kind of neighbor was Larry Hagman?

Larry was out there. All fun and games. You never knew what he was going to do next. He didn’t talk on Sundays because he once did a play and lost his voice. The doctor said, “Well, just don’t talk on Sunday.” So he did that, but he kept it up for years. He’d have a party at his place on the beach, but he wouldn’t talk. He would serve you champagne with a wink or write things down on a chalkboard or something. [Laughs] But he was just a great guy. Everybody loved Larry.

And you mentioned his memorial service. You went to the one at Southfork, right?

Yeah. That was the first time I’d been out there. I didn’t get to see much of the ranch, but it was wonderful. It was just happy. It was the way he wanted it. They had big screens up with all of his past endeavors. It was just all very cool.

Well, what can you tell us about your character on “Dallas”?

I can tell you a little. His name is Ken Richards and he had a past relationship with Sue Ellen. We were probably lovers or had an affection for each other. And then she calls me out of the blue for a meeting, and she needs a little help in a manner that I can’t discuss. [Laughs]

This sounds like so much fun. All I’ll say is you better be nice to Sue Ellen.

I’m very nice.

Oh, good!

If I want to survive I have to be. [Laughs]

Well, on this show, being bad is sometimes the way to get ahead.

Yeah, I know. I tuned into some back shows. I’ve been trying to keep up with who’s doing who and what for. That Josh [Henderson], he’s in and out of the bed every minute. And I was shocked when Brenda Strong’s character shot Harris. [Laughs] I saw her on the set yesterday and I said, “Are you still in jail? What’s happening?” And she says, “I don’t know! I’m trying to get bail.” I said, “You can’t get bail. You’ve been convicted already!”

The show seems very top-secret.

Well, they leave every show with a cliffhanger, so if you talk about the next episode, you get in trouble. They’re very tight-lipped. They gave a script to me and it’s got my name blazed across every page so that if they see one somewhere, they’ll know where it came from. You’re supposed to shred them.

Have you gotten to know the other cast members?

Some of the younger ones I haven’t worked with. I did do a scene with Jesse [Metcalfe] yesterday. There was a little scuffle is all I can say. [Laughs] I’ve known Patrick [Duffy] for a long time. Of course, Linda [Gray] and I hadn’t met, but when we did our first scene there was a chemistry there, which was good. And she was very happy with it and they seem to be very happy with me and the character so we’ll see what happens.

You know you’re not the first bionic secret agent to have a fling with Linda Gray.

I hope the first wasn’t Lindsay Wagner! [Laughs]

[Laughs] I was referring to Monte Markham, who was Sue Ellen’s college sweetheart and a bionic bad guy on your show.

I remember that, yeah.

And Martha Scott played your mom on “The Six Million Dollar Man” and Sue Ellen’s mom on “Dallas.”

You’re decoding everything here.

Sorry, I can’t help myself.

Do you know, though, that Lindsay Wagner is Linda Gray’s niece?

No kidding?

Yeah. My agent, who represented Lindsay for awhile, told me that when I went to do the first episode. And actually, she brought it up too. So there’s a tidbit that’s unique.

It’s very “Dallas”! Everyone is related to everyone else. Speaking of which: Were you a fan of the original show?

Yeah, but it was on during the ’80s when I was busy doing “The Fall Guy.” And of course, I’d see Larry on the weekends but we never talked business. We never talked about our shows. We just wanted to forget it for the weekend. When you’re working all that week, I never got to watch his show and he probably never watched mine.

It would’ve been great if you two could’ve done “Dallas” together. Do you feel his presence on the set?

Yeah. They still have his trailer with his name on the door and his name is still on the call sheet every day. You can certainly feel it. And I do because I thank him every day for the job.

So I’ve got to ask: Would you want to see “The Six Million Dollar Man” come back with the original cast, the way “Dallas” has?

No. [Laughs] Unless I could play Oscar Goldman.

You don’t want to be Steve again?

No. I would like to sit in an office and point my finger and talk on the phone: “Now, Steve, I want you to go here….”

Share your comments below and read more interviews from Dallas Decoder.