Linda Gray – Dallas Decoder

Dallas Burning Questions: Season 3, Week 4

March 17, 2014 by Chris Baker 7 Comments

Dallas, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes Ewing, Playing Chicken, TNT

Mama sees all

Here are the questions we’re pondering as we await tonight’s telecast of “Lifting the Veil,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode:

• What will Sue Ellen do about John Ross? In “Playing Chicken,” Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) continued to plan a traditional Southfork wedding for the recently eloped John Ross and Pamela (Josh Henderson, Julie Gonzalo), even though she harbored lingering doubts about her son’s fidelity to his bride. Sue Ellen told Ann (Brenda Strong) she feared John Ross was sleeping with Emma (Emma Bell); Ann then shared Sue Ellen’s suspicions with Harris (Mitch Pileggi) and asked him to help her reign in their daughter. Meanwhile, Sue Ellen met with Bum (Kevin Page) to determine if he told her the truth about John Ross being faithful to Pamela. After Sue Ellen laid a major guilt trip on Bum, he confessed everything. “I lied to you, Sue Ellen. You were right about John Ross and Emma. I’m sorry,” Bum said. Sue Ellen’s response: “Not nearly as sorry as I am.” How will she deal with the truth about her son?

• What will Judith do about John Ross? When Harris told Judith (Judith Light) that Emma and John Ross are sleeping together, Judith was nonplussed. “Good for her. John Ross is a nice-looking young man,” she said. But Judith changed her tune when Harris told her John Ross now possesses Harris’s secret files, which he said contains “unflattering” information about her. She told Harris, “I’m sure we can find something to compromise young Mr. Ewing enough to convince him to return those files. And by ‘we,’ of course I mean ‘me.’” What should worry John Ross more — the fact that Judith thinks he’s cute or the fact she wants those files back?

• Will John Ross and Pamela say, “I do”? Emma seemed determined to undermine John Ross’s marriage. She buddied up to Pamela during a shopping spree and then ruined her plan to surprise John Ross with new lingerie: Emma bought the same outfit and wore it for John Ross first; when he saw Pamela wearing it, he was rattled and lost interest in having sex with his wife. Given all the turbulence in John Ross’s life, we wonder: Will his wedding to Pamela go off without a hitch?

• What will Elena and Nicolas do next? Nicolas (Juan Pablo Di Pace) tracked down Rhonda Simmons (Emily Kosloski), the woman whose testimony helped convict Cliff (Ken Kercheval) of J.R.’s “murder,” and offered her $25,000 to admit she lied, but Rhonda refused to betray the Ewings. Meanwhile, Elena (Jordana Brewster) came up empty-handed when she searched for surveillance video to prove Cliff’s gun was stolen from the firing range. The setbacks frustrated Elena, but Nicolas confessed his love for her and they had sex — unaware that Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) was digging into Nicolas’s past in Mexico, where he met a beautiful woman named Lucia (Angélica Celaya), who introduced herself as Nicolas’s wife. Should Elena continue to trust Nicolas — and should Christopher trust Lucia?

• What will the Ewings do about their business? John Ross blackmailed Bo (Donny Boaz) into joining his Southfork drilling venture by threatening to expose the ranch hand’s drug-dealing past. But John Ross’s scheming was for naught: Bobby (Patrick Duffy) shut down the project when he revealed the state would refuse to issue John Ross a drilling permit because the project endangered the lesser prairie chicken, a threatened species in Texas. If the Ewings can’t tap the oil under the ranch, how will they finance their Arctic drilling plans?

• Will our old favorites have much to do? John Ross and Pamela’s wedding will bring three stars from the original “Dallas” back to Southfork: Lucy (Charlene Tilton), Ray (Steve Kanaly) and Afton (Audrey Landers). When Kanaly spoke to Dallas Decoder before production on this episode began, he told us Ray and Lucy don’t have big roles in this episode, but suggested Afton will be featured more prominently. If nothing else, will we hear the divine Miss Cooper sing?

What “Dallas Burning Questions” are on your mind? Share your comments below and watch TNT’s “Dallas” tonight.

Filed Under: Dallas Burning Questions, Features Tagged With: Angélica Celaya, Audrey Landers, Brenda Strong, Charlene Tilton, Emily Kosloski, Emma Bell, Jesse Metcalfe, Jordana Brewster, Josh Henderson, Juan Pablo di Pace, Judith Light, Julie Gonzalo, Kevin Page, Lifting the Veil, Linda Gray, Mitch Pileggi, Patrick Duffy, Playing Chicken, Steve Kanaly, TNT

TNT’s Dallas Styles: ‘Playing Chicken’

March 14, 2014 by Chris Baker 5 Comments

There were a lot of classic looks in “Playing Chicken,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode, including the long-sleeved blue dress that Linda Gray wore during Sue Ellen’s memorable lunch with Bum. Gray looks great no matter what you dress her in, but blue has always been one of her best colors. I also love how Sue Ellen’s blue-and-green dangly earrings complemented the dress. It was kind of hard to see them when the scene began, but as Sue Ellen and Bum’s conversation progressed — and it became clear she was playing him like a fiddle — the earrings seemed to reveal themselves more. They became an effective symbol for her below-the-radar manipulation of poor, well-meaning Bum.

The guys sported timeless looks in “Playing Chicken” too. John Ross spent much of this episode in western garb, including the dark blue denim shirt he wore in the scene where he learned about the plight of the lesser prairie chicken. It evoked the cowboy-hats-and-jeans getups that Josh Henderson sported during “Dallas’s” first season. I also loved the white shirt and khakis that Jesse Metcalfe wore in Christopher’s scenes in Mexico. The outfit was stylish yet practical; if I had to go sleuthing around the hot, dusty streets of Nuevo Laredo, this is probably what I’d wear.

Of course, “Playing Chicken” will probably be remembered for all the revealing outfits. No one showed more skin than Emma Bell’s Emma Ryland, who strutted around Southfork in that tangerine “monokini.” Like Sue Ellen’s earrings, the swimsuit can be seen as a symbol since it helped expose Emma’s determination to undermine John Ross and Pamela’s marriage. (By the way, in response to all the inquiries from fans, costume designer Rachel Sage Kunin tweeted the bathing suit came from Sauvage Swimwear.)

And then there were the dueling emerald green corsets worn by Bell and Julie Gonzalo’s Pamela Barnes Ewing. Yowza! Not since Sue Ellen dabbled in the lingerie business back in the 1980s have we seen such revealing undergarments on “Dallas.” This wasn’t just an excuse to put Bell and Gonzalo in skimpy underwear, either; now that we know Emma intentionally ruined Pamela’s surprise for John Ross, we have a whole new reason to despise her.

The question is: Who wore it best? I like the way Gonzalo settled this debate when TNT posed the question to viewers at the end of the episode. As Gonzalo tweeted, “Who wore it best?!? SCREW THAT. we BOTH did!”

Darlin’, we couldn’t have said it better ourselves.

What were your favorite looks in “Playing Chicken”? Share your thoughts in the comments section below and read more “Dallas Styles.”

Filed Under: Dallas Styles, Dallas Styles (TNT), Features Tagged With: Emma Bell, Jesse Metcalfe, Josh Henderson, Julie Gonzalo, Linda Gray, Playing Chicken, Rachel Sage Kunin, TNT

Critique: TNT’s ‘Dallas’ Episode 28 — ‘Playing Chicken’

March 12, 2014 by Chris Baker 23 Comments

Bobby Ewing, Patrick Duffy, Playing Chicken, TNT

Always the winner

Bobby Ewing plays two games of chicken in “Playing Chicken,” and of course he wins both. First, Bobby uses — forgive me for this — fowl means to foil John Ross’s latest scheme to drill on Southfork. Later, when Nicolas tries to prove the Ewings framed Cliff for J.R.’s “murder,” Bobby faces off against the younger man and forces him to blink first. Both scenes are a kick, reminding us how essential Patrick Duffy is to “Dallas.” They also demonstrate Duffy’s versatility; no matter what the script calls for, this man always delivers — and he always looks damn cool doing it.

The scene with John Ross opens with Josh Henderson’s character giving his crew of ranch-hands-turned-roughnecks a pep talk when a cheerful Uncle Bobby shows up toting a cage with a big bird inside. Bobby proceeds to give his ambitious nephew a lesson on the plight of the “lesser prairie chicken,” explaining how it’s an endangered species whose presence on Southfork means the government will deny John Ross’s request for a drilling permit, lest he disturb the creature’s natural habitat. John Ross fumes; Bobby smiles. “He is awful cute, though, isn’t he?” Bobby asks, motioning toward the cage.

I love this scene mostly because it’s nice to see “Dallas” lighten up, but also because it recalls all the times Bobby bested J.R. with a wink and a grin. The role of happy warrior has always suited Duffy well, and his timing here is as sharp as ever. Everyone else seems to get into the spirit too: Henderson shows he can deadpan with the best of them, while director Jesse Bochco delivers a whimsical shot of John Ross from inside the chicken’s cage. (Shades of the “horse-cam” used to shoot Emma Bell last year.) Even composer Rob Cairns has a little fun with this scene; his underscore is noticeably jauntier than usual.

Bobby’s other big scene begins with Nicolas arriving in a darkened parking lot to meet Rhonda Simmons, the club hostess whose testimony helped convict Cliff. Nicolas believes Rhonda is going to turn against the Ewings; when he finds her standing near her car, he congratulates her and tells her she’s made “the right decision.” Suddenly, the passenger door opens and out steps … Bobby, who makes it clear Rhonda isn’t changing her story after all. This would be a triumphant moment no matter which Ewing had emerged from Rhonda’s car, but the fact that it’s Bobby makes it especially satisfying. He’s always been our white knight, and frankly he’s the only Ewing with the moral authority to make framing Cliff for murder seem like the right thing to do.

But even though Patrick Duffy is the indisputable man of the hour in “Playing Chicken,” Gail Gilchriest’s terrific script ensures no one gets shortchanged. It’s especially nice to see lots of scenes with the always wonderful Brenda Strong, whose character gets to demonstrate a little personal growth. When Sue Ellen confides in Ann her fears about John Ross and Emma, I expect Ann to dismiss the suggestion outright. Instead, she says, “I know I’ve been defensive about Emma’s behavior in the past. You were right about her drug use. Maybe you’re right this time too.” Strong always makes Ann feel like one of the grownups in the room, but the job is easier when she has smart writing like this to work with.

It’s also interesting to see Ann turn to Harris to help reign in Emma. I love Duffy and Strong together, but there’s also no denying the actress’s chemistry with Mitch Pileggi. Does this scene suggest Ann is softening toward her ex-husband? Or is the show merely using Ann to smooth Harris’s rough edges? During their conversation, Ann urges Harris to come clean to Emma about his connection to the CIA; he rejects that suggestion, but he nonetheless reveals a little humility: “I never meant to put the people that I love in danger, Annie. As awful as you think I am, I do love our daughter.” Who knew the “l” word was in Harris’s vocabulary? Also, notice how he says “the people that I love.” Does that include Ann?

Other highlights: Sue Ellen’s masterful manipulation of Bum, as well as the scene where he shows up on her doorstep and confesses his deception. I’m delighted “Dallas” is exploring the relationship between these characters, not just because they have such an opposites attract charm — the uptown lady and the downtown private eye — but also because Kevin Page might be the only actor on this show who comes close to matching Linda Gray’s soulfulness. I have no idea where Sue Ellen and Bum are headed, but whether they remain friends or become something more, I hope we keep seeing a lot of scenes between them.

I’m a little less enthralled with the romance that develops in “Playing Chicken” between Elena and Nicolas, especially since we’ve been told their characters grew up thinking of each other as siblings. On the other hand, I’m more impressed than ever with Juan Pablo Di Pace: Nicolas is so suave and charming in his first two “Dallas” appearances, but in “Playing Chicken,” there are times he seems downright sinister. At the end of this episode, we learn Nicolas has a wife — Angélica Celaya makes an intriguing debut as Lucia Treviño — and I have no doubt we’re going to learn he’s hiding even more.

I also like “Playing Chicken’s” scenes of Christopher sleuthing around Mexico, as well as the fun Gilchriest has with John Ross’s complicated love life. No one delivers oh-no-she-didn’t moments better than Bell: What makes us despise Emma Ryland more, when she accompanies Pamela on the shopping trip and brags about her lover’s sexual prowess, or when she shows up at John Ross’s office wearing the same emerald corset that Pamela is planning to surprise him with? Fans are directing a lot of venom at Bell’s character on social media these days, and I hope the actress is wearing it as a badge of honor. She’s doing a fantastic job making Emma a vixen we love to hate.

I’m also left pondering the scene where John Ross rejects Pamela’s romantic overtures. Is this an attack of conscience, or is he beginning to realize Emma is dangerous? Whatever the reason, John Ross’s personal entanglements are probably going to be the least of his worries. In “Playing Chicken’s” most chilling scene, Harris tells Judith that the files in his safe — which include “unflattering” information about her — are now in John Ross’s possession. Says Judith: “I’m sure we can find something to compromise young Mr. Ewing enough to convince him to return those files. And by ‘we,’ of course I mean ‘me.’” If you were John Ross, what would make your heart drop more — hearing Judith say she wants to “convince” you of something or hearing her earlier statement that she thinks you’re “a nice-looking young man.” Shudder.

More than anything, this episode demonstrates how “Dallas” is finding a new rhythm in its third season. The first hour, “The Return,” took its time establishing the year’s themes and plotlines; the second episode, “Trust Me,” delivered the twists and turns we’ve come to expect from the TNT series (Judith does coke! Harris is CIA!); and “Playing Chicken” slows down the action once more to allow the audience to catch its breath. If the pattern holds, does that mean the next installment will be another roller coaster? I wouldn’t bet against it, especially now that we know Judith Ryland has John Ross in her crosshairs. Let the battle of the “J.R.s” begin.

Grade: A

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Good at being bad

‘PLAYING CHICKEN’

Season 3, Episode 3

Telecast: March 10, 2014

Audience: 1.9 million viewers on March 10

Writer: Gail Gilchriest

Director: Jesse Bochco

Synopsis: Christopher investigates Nicolas in Mexico, where he meets Lucia, Nicolas’s wife. Bobby foils John Ross’s attempt to drill on Southfork and Nicolas’s attempt to turn Rhonda against the Ewings. Later, Nicolas reveals long-hidden feelings to Elena and they have sex. Bum admits to Sue Ellen that John Ross is sleeping with Emma. When Harris tells Judith that Emma gave damaging files about her to John Ross, Judith vows to “convince” John Ross to give back the documents. Bobby promises Ann he’ll keep her and Emma safe following Harris’s revelation that he’s working with the CIA to bring down the drug cartel.

Cast: Emma Bell (Emma Ryland), Donny Boaz (Bo McCabe), Jordana Brewster (Elena Ramos), Angélica Celaya (Lucia Treviño), Juan Pablo Di Pace (Nicolas Treviño), Patrick Duffy (Bobby Ewing), Julie Gonzalo (Pamela Ewing), Currie Graham (Commissioner Stanley Babcock), Linda Gray (Sue Ellen Ewing), Josh Henderson (John Ross Ewing), Ken Kercheval (Cliff Barnes), Emily Kosloski (Rhonda Simmons), Judith Light (Judith Ryland), Jesse Metcalfe (Christopher Ewing), Scott Mullins (Nate), Kevin Page (Bum), Mitch Pileggi (Harris Ryland), Geoffrey Rivas (shopkeeper), Aaron Spivey-Sorrells (ranch hand), Brenda Strong (Ann Ewing), Michael Swanner (Dewey Templeton)

“Playing Chicken” is available at DallasTNT.com, Amazon.com and iTunes. Watch the episode and share your comments below.

Filed Under: Critiques, Critiques (TNT), Opinion Tagged With: Angélica Celaya, Brenda Strong, Emma Bell, Gail Gilchriest, Jesse Bochco, Josh Henderson, Juan Pablo di Pace, Kevin Page, Linda Gray, Patrick Duffy, Playing Chicken, Rob Cairns, TNT

TNT’s Dallas Recap: ‘Playing Chicken’

March 11, 2014 by Chris Baker 6 Comments

Dallas, Emma Bell, Emma Ryland, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, Playing Chicken, TNT

Home to roost

Here’s what happened in “Playing Chicken,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode:

• Christopher searched for the truth about Nicolas. Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) went to the federal prison in Nuevo Laredo, where he questioned Cliff (Ken Kercheval) about his connection to Nicolas. Cliff didn’t supply any answers, but Christopher fared better when he tracked down Nicolas’s ex-business partner, whom Nicolas cheated on his rise to the top — and who told Christopher that “Nicolas Treviño” isn’t Nicolas’s real name.

Later, several armed men approached Christopher outside his hotel and brought him to Nicolas’s compound, where he met a beautiful woman (Angélica Celaya) with two small sons. When Christopher asked the woman what she knows about Nicolas, she responded: “I can tell you quite a bit. I’m Lucia Treviño, his wife.”

• Nicolas and Elena searched for the truth about the Ewings. Back in Dallas, Nicolas (Juan Pablo Di Pace) tracked down Rhonda Simmons (Emily Kosloski), the woman whose testimony helped convict Cliff for J.R.’s murder, and offered her $25,000 to admit she lied. The next night, Nicolas met with Rhonda again, expecting her to talk, except she brought along a surprise guest: Bobby (Patrick Duffy), who insisted Rhonda was being honest when she implicated Cliff. “Sometimes the truth hurts,” Bobby told Nicolas.

Elena (Jordana Brewster) fared no better: She went to the firing range where Cliff used to practice, hoping to find the surveillance video that would prove his gun was stolen, only to discover the footage had mysteriously vanished. Elena felt defeated, but Nicolas assured her the two of them will ultimately beat the Ewings — and to demonstrate his dedication, he revealed long-hidden feelings for her. “I never wanted a woman more than I want you, and if you’ll allow me, I want a chance to make you happy,” Nicolas said. He and Elena kissed — and then they did much more.

• Sue Ellen found out the truth about John Ross. After Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) saw Emma flirting with John Ross, she confided in Ann her suspicion that John Ross and Emma are having an affair. Ann (Brenda Strong) didn’t reject the suggestion. “You were right about her drug use. Maybe you’re right this time too,” she said. Ann later urged Emma (Emma Bell) to stop wearing skimpy bikinis around Southfork, while Sue Ellen went to work on Bum (Kevin Page) to determine if he told the truth about John Ross being faithful to Pamela.

Sue Ellen’s plan worked: After she laid a major guilt trip on Bum, he showed up on her doorstep and confessed everything. “I lied to you, Sue Ellen. You were right about John Ross and Emma. I’m sorry,” Bum said. Sue Ellen’s response: “Not nearly as sorry as I am.”

• Bobby and Ann dealt with the truth about Harris. Bobby and Ann struggled to wrap their heads around the fact that Harris is secretly helping the CIA try to bring down the Mendez-Ochoa cartel. Bobby beefed up security at Southfork and told Ann that she shouldn’t worry about their family’s well-being. “You and Emma will always be safe on Southfork. Always. You can count on it,” Bobby said.

Later, while Pamela (Julie Gonzalo) and Emma went shopping for lingerie for Pamela’s honeymoon, Ann went to see Harris (Mitch Pileggi) and told him she fears their daughter is “acting out” against her father by sleeping with John Ross. Ann urged Harris to come clean to Emma about his CIA connection, but he refused. “I wish I could trust her with that, but I can’t,” Harris said. He added: “I never meant to put the people that I love in danger, Annie. As awful as you think I am, I do love our daughter.”

• John Ross learned the truth about chickens. John Ross (Josh Henderson) blackmailed Bo (Donny Boaz) into joining his Southfork drilling venture by threatening to expose the ranch hand’s drug-dealing past. But John Ross’s scheming was for naught: Bobby shut down the project when he revealed the state would refuse to issue John Ross a drilling permit because the project endangered the lesser prairie chicken, a threatened species in Texas. Later, when John Ross came home after cavorting at the office with Emma and found Pamela wearing the same teddy that his mistress had been wearing, he felt an attack of conscience and headed for the shower, leaving his wife looking more than a little hurt.

This might be the least of John Ross’s problems: When Harris told Judith (Judith Light) that Emma gave John Ross the Ryland files — which Harris said contain “unflattering” information about Judith — Mama Ryland narrowed her eyes and began plotting. “I’m sure we can find something to compromise young Mr. Ewing enough to convince him to return those files,” Judith said. “And by ‘we,’ of course I mean ‘me.’”

What did you think of “Playing Chicken”? Share your comments below and look for Dallas Decoder’s critique later this week.

Filed Under: Dallas Recaps, Features Tagged With: Angélica Celaya, Brenda Strong, Donny Boaz, Emily Kosloski, Emma Bell, Jesse Metcalfe, Jordana Brewster, Josh Henderson, Juan Pablo di Pace, Judith Light, Julie Gonzalo, Ken Kercheval, Kevin Page, Linda Gray, Mitch Pileggi, Patrick Duffy, Playing Chicken, TNT

The Dal-List: 15 Reasons You Should Be Watching ‘Dallas’

March 10, 2014 by Chris Baker 32 Comments

Dallas, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes Ewing, TNT

Watch and love

What’s that, you say? You’re not watching the new season of “Dallas”? Well, put down that bottle of stupid pills and listen up. Here are 15 excellent reasons to start tuning in to the series, which TNT shows every Monday night.

Dallas, Judith Light, Judith Ryland, TNT

Snow’s the boss

15. Judith Ryland is nuts. Remember Angela Bower, Light’s sensible, self-controlled character on “Who’s the Boss?” Well, go ahead and put that performance out of your mind because Angela is nothing like Judith Ryland, the coke-snortin’, drug-traffickin’, truth-bomb-droppin’, cane-thumpin’ control freak Light plays on “Dallas.” Judith is the most wicked and unpredictable character on television today. What will crazy lady do next? I have no clue, but I can’t wait to find out.

Dallas, Juan Pablo Di Pace, Nicolas Trevino, TNT

Delicious

14. Di Pace = Divine. So the Ewings are sitting around their boardroom, being Ewings, when all of a sudden some dude named “Nicolas Treviño” waltzes in and starts bossing everyone around. Who is Nicolas? Who cares! What matters is that he’s played by Juan Pablo Di Pace, who is absolutely delectable. I mean, look at this guy. How is he even real? Di Pace is suave, charming and so far, he’s had sexual chemistry with virtually everyone he’s had a scene with. Don’t you want to be there when Judith meets him?

Dallas, Elena Ramos, John Ross Ewing, Jordana Brewster, Josh Henderson, Linda Gray, Sue Ellen Ewing, TNT

Watch and learn

13. You can learn stuff. Did you know that in Texas, a company can’t unload a major division unless a “supermajority” of its shareholders approve the sale? Or that sometimes oil-rich “shale formations” can rise within a property’s “surface rights”? I know both things are true because “Dallas” tells me so. I’ll confess: I’m sometimes dubious of the veracity of the legal and technical mumbo-jumbo these characters spout, but it mostly checks out. So do your brain a favor and start watching. You’ll be entertained and enlightened.

Bum, Dallas, Kevin Page, Steve Jones, TNT

Bum in the night

12. Bum. You know what’s really cool about “Dallas” this season? Kevin Page is being featured more prominently than ever. His character, Steve “Bum” Jones, will go down in TV history as the last guy to shoot J.R., but Page’s greatest contribution to the show might be the way Bum has become John Ross’s conscience. And am I the only one who’s noticed Page’s off-the-charts chemistry with Linda Gray? He’s now a vital part of “Dallas.” Here’s hoping Bum gets bumped up to a series regular soon.

Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Jesse Metcalfe, TNT

Perfection

11. Jesse Metcalfe has a beard now. I know what you’re thinking: Metcalfe has such a nice face, why cover it up? I felt that way when I heard about the beard too. But then I saw it and oh my goodness it’s the best beard in the history of facial hair. (Yours is nice too, Mr. Pileggi.) I mean, take a look at that thing. What’s not to love? The sad part is the beard is going to go away midseason, but that’s still a good a reason to watch the show. Let’s all savor every second of Christopher’s scruff before he shaves it off.

Total. Badass.

10. Bobby Ewing is still pissed! Remember when Bobby screamed at Ann before J.R.’s funeral last season? Well, Patrick Duffy continues to bring an edge to his character this year. Who didn’t love Bobby’s recent “stupid pills” quip, or how he always looks like he wants to throttle John Ross? There’s also this: Duffy’s portion of “Dallas’s” new opening credits feature last year’s scene in which Bobby did that badass, “Reservoir Dogs”-style slow-mo walk. Now we get to relive it each week!

Feel the love

9. Brenda Strong is awesome. We love Ann Ewing. We love how she stands by Bobby, how she embraces the Ewings for all their Ewing-ness, how she never seems to regret that one time she tried to kill Harris. That’s what makes Strong such an amazing actress. No matter what the script calls for, she never let us lose sight of her character’s humanity — even when Ann grabs her gun and starts shooting people. And isn’t it cool that Patrick Duffy finally has a leading lady who can look him in the eye?

Dallas, Elena Ramos, Jordana Brewster, TNT

Spy in the house

8. Elena Ramos is a sneaky bitch. Did you watch the first two seasons of TNT’s “Dallas”? Remember how Jordana Brewster’s character never had much to do? Yeah, well, those days are over. Elena found out J.R. Ewing screwed over her daddy and now she’s joined forces with Cliff Barnes to secretly plot against the rest of the Ewings. Does it make sense? No, but Brewster is such a good actress, she makes it all seem perfectly reasonable. Isn’t it great to see her get a juicy storyline to sink her teeth into?

So good at being bad

7. Emma Ryland is a naughty bitch. Look, I love my bitches, OK? One of my all-time favorite “Dallas” characters is Mary Crosby’s Kristin Shepard, the shrew who shot J.R. The old show killed off Crosby waaay too soon, but now that we have Emma Bell slinking around Southfork, it’s almost like Kristin’s back. Bell’s character, shameless Emma Ryland, is an oversexed vixen who can’t keep her hands off John Ross. (Blame her?) It doesn’t hurt that Bell is also a terrific actress. No one does bad better.

Dallas, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes Ewing, TNT

We’re not worthy

6. Julie Gonzalo is fabulous. Is there a more fascinating young heroine on television today than Pamela Barnes Ewing? The answer is no, there is not. Every season, Gonzalo unravels new layers of her character; she’s played Pamela as a sweet-as-spun-sugar ingénue, a corporate tigress, a devastated daughter, and now a suspicious bride. Gonzalo’s talents know no bounds, and even though I’m a gay man, I’m kind of in love with her. (It’s cool, though, because my partner loves her too.) All hail Queen Julie!

Dallas, Harris Ryland, Mitch Pileggi, TNT

This stud’s for us

5. Ryland, Harris Ryland. Mitch Pileggi may be best known as Skinner on “The X Files,” but is there any doubt Harris Ryland is the role he was born to play? Pileggi brings a wicked, Hagman-esque gleefulness to his “Dallas” performances; he’s so damned charismatic, you can’t help but root for Harris, no matter how mean he is to the Ewings. This character is constantly keeping us on our toes — now that we know he’s CIA, should we trust him? — but one thing is certain: Pileggi is a total stud.

Dressed to thrill

4. This is the best-dressed cast on TV. One of “Dallas’s” biggest stars works behind the camera: Rachel Sage Kunin, the show’s insanely gifted costume designer. In every scene of every episode, Kunin somehow chooses the absolute perfect look for each character. One example: Heather’s sexy dress/cowgirl boots combo, which showed how the character was both tough and feminine. Kunin isn’t just the show’s wardrobe chief; she’s a storyteller in her own right — and a hugely talented one at that.

Dallas, Linda Gray, Sue Ellen Ewing, TNT

Always our darlin’

3. Sue Ellen is drunk again. Hold on, darlins. I’m not celebrating the fact our beloved heroine has fallen off the wagon. OK, I guess I am celebrating it, but only because I know Sue Ellen’s road back to sobriety is going to be a blockbuster television — and that means we’re going to be treated to another knockout performance from Linda Gray. As phenomenal as she was last year, my gut tells me Gray is going to be even more spectacular this season. Who knew such a thing was even possible?

Dallas, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, TNT

The son also rises

2. This guy. Oh, Josh Henderson. Where do I even begin with you? You impress the hell out of me. Your performance honors both of your TV parents: In your capable hands, John Ross is as ambitious as J.R. and as sensitive as Sue Ellen. You’re also a brilliant foil for Uncle Bobby and Cousin Christopher and the perfect match for Pamela. And then there’s that smile of yours, which is sweet, sly and oh-so-sexy — all at once. Is John Ross now one of the best reasons to watch “Dallas”? Damn skippy, he is.

Do it for him

1. This guy too. No one loved a good time more than Larry Hagman, the great actor who brought J.R. Ewing to life. If Mr. Hagman were still here, I have a feeling he’d love how much fun TNT’s “Dallas” has become. Everyone involved in creating the show — the writers, the directors, the actors, the crew — is making Mr. Hagman proud by churning out the most consistently entertaining hour of television, week after week. Now it’s time for the audience to do its part by watching and enjoying the show!

What do you love about “Dallas’s” third season? Share your comments below and read more “Dal-Lists.”

Filed Under: Dal-Lists, Opinion Tagged With: Brenda Strong, Emma Bell, Jesse Metcalfe, Jordana Brewster, Josh Henderson, Judith Light, Julie Gonzalo, Larry Hagman, Linda Gray, Mary Crosby, Mitch Pileggi, Patrick Duffy, Rachel Sage Kunin, TNT, Who Shot J.R.?

Dallas Burning Questions: Season 3, Week 3

March 10, 2014 by Chris Baker 2 Comments

Dallas, Emma Bell, Emma Ryland, Linda Gray, Sue Ellen Ewing, TNT, Trust Me

Confronting the truth

Here are the questions we’re pondering as we await tonight’s telecast of “Playing Chicken,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode:

• Is Harris telling the truth? In “Trust Me,” last week’s episode, Bobby and Ann (Patrick Duffy, Brenda Strong) were stunned to discover Harris (Mitch Pileggi) was released from jail. When Bobby and Ann began investigating the circumstances of his release, they were summoned to a darkened warehouse, where a mystery man who identified himself as a CIA agent ordered the Ewings to stop snooping into Harris’s business. Harris emerged from the shadows and explained why: He’s secretly working with the CIA to bring down the Mendez-Ochoa drug cartel, and if Bobby and Ann keep asking questions, it could blow his cover and jeopardize lives. “They have pictures of our daughter — and you, Annie,” Harris said of the cartel. “Now if they find out who I’m working for, they’ll kill both you and Emma.” Should Bobby and Ann believe him?

• What will happen to Judith? Earlier in the episode, when Harris learned Emma (Emma Bell) had agreed to give the Ewings access to Ryland Transport’s new drilling and cargo ships, he wondered if his daughter was still taking drugs and threatened to send her to a “secure therapeutic setting.” Emma retaliated by springing Judith (Judith Light) from the rehab hospital, and before Harris knew it, Mama Ryland had seized control of the family business. Judith made Harris take her to Mexico, where she met with the drug lord Luis (Antonio Jaramillo), negotiated a new deal to smuggle his cocaine into Texas — and then sampled the product herself. “Hot damn! Mama like,” Judith said after snorting Luis’s coke. Little did she know Harris was secretly recording the meeting. What will he do with the evidence?

• Will John Ross “frack” Southfork? To finance the Ewings’ new Arctic drilling venture, John Ross continued to insist on tapping the oil under Southfork by using an environmentally questionable process known as “fracking.” He claimed the ranch’s oil-rich “shale formation” falls within his surface rights, so Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) asked seismologist Howard Rieder (Christian Clemenson) to investigate, hoping to prove his ambitious cousin wrong. John Ross tried to bribe Howard to make sure the test came out his way, but Howard confessed all to Bobby, who told him to keep the money and give him the test results straight. When the results came in, they showed the shale is indeed with the surface rights. “That settles it. … We’re fracking Southfork,” John Ross said. Will he?

• What will happen to the ranch hands? When Heather (AnnaLynne McCord) heard the Ewings might frack the ranch, she angrily confronted Christopher and explained it would put many ranch hands out of work. Christopher explained that he and Bobby want to protect Southfork and invited Heather to the Ewing Barbecue, where she kissed him and told him she’d like to see more of him in the future. If the fracking occurs, will she still feel that way? And what will happen to Southfork’s other ranch hands, including Emma’s onetime beau, Bo (Donny Boaz)?

• Will Sue Ellen and Pamela discover the truth? Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) asked Bum (Kevin Page) to follow John Ross to confirm her suspicion that he’s cheating with Emma. Bum photographed John Ross and Emma cavorting in John Ross’s penthouse, but Bum lied and told Sue Ellen that her son “never went near” Miss Ryland. Instead, Bum showed the pictures to John Ross and told him to wise up and stop cheating on Pamela (Julie Gonzalo), who also began to notice her husband’s wandering eye. Will Sue Ellen and Pamela’s suspicions be proven correct?

• Are Elena and Nicolas closing in on the Ewings? At the Ewing Barbecue, Elena (Jordana Brewster) snooped around Bobby’s laptop and came across an email to Carlos del Sol in which Bobby wrote, “Talked to Rhonda Simmons. She agreed to play ball with us about JR.” Elena showed the email to Nicolas (Juan Pablo Di Pace) and explained that Rhonda (Emily Kosloski) was the witness whose testimony placed Cliff in Nuevo Laredo, Mexico, on the night J.R. was killed. “That’s got to mean something,” Elena said as she studied Bobby’s email. Meanwhile, when Elena realized Nicolas would run into Carmen (Marlene Forte) at the barbecue, she reluctantly told her mother she was plotting against the Ewings but didn’t offer details. Carmen was aghast. Will she keep Elena and Nicolas’s secret?

• Are the Ewings closing in on Elena and Nicolas? Elsewhere, Christopher quizzed Nicolas about his business dealings with Cliff (Ken Kercheval) and realized the details didn’t add up. Christopher shared his suspicions with Bobby, who told him to go to Mexico to see what he could find out about Nicolas’s past. What will Christopher learn when he goes south of the border?

What “Dallas Burning Questions” are on your mind? Share your comments below and watch TNT’s “Dallas” tonight.

Filed Under: Dallas Burning Questions, Features Tagged With: Antonio Jaramillo, Brenda Strong, Christian Clemenson, Donny Boaz, Emily Kosloski, Emma Bell, Jesse Metcalfe, Jordana Brewster, Judith Light, Julie Gonzalo, Ken Kercheval, Linda Gray, Marlene Forte, Mitch Pileggi, Patrick Duffy, Playing Chicken, TNT, Trust Me

TNT’s Dallas Styles: ‘Trust Me’

March 7, 2014 by Chris Baker 5 Comments

The crowd may have been smaller than in days gone by and no one got dunked in the pool, but there’s one area where this week’s Ewing Barbecue lived up to tradition: the clothing. The Southfork shindigs on the original “Dallas” always allowed the characters to dress a little more playfully than usual, and so did the barbecue in “Trust Me,” TNT’s latest episode.

My favorite look belonged to Linda Gray, who sported a nifty brown cowgirl hat that brought back memories of the hats Sue Ellen wore to the Southfork hoedowns of the 1980s. I also couldn’t help but smile when AnnaLynne McCord’s character, Heather, showed up at the party in that beautiful white dress; it reminded me of the simple, elegant dress Pam Ewing sported at “Dallas’s” first barbecue in 1978. I also loved how costume designer Rachel Sage Kunin paired Heather’s dress with weathered cowgirl boots; it was an ideal combination for McCord’s tomboyish character.

Juan Pablo Di Pace was the best-dressed man at the barbecue (although Jesse Metcalfe was a close second in that dark blue denim shirt). Nicolas, an out-of-town Latin American businessman, came to the party dressed just like we would expect him to: Instead of western garb, he wore a light-colored sport coat and trousers and an open-collared white shirt that strategically showcased the St. Christopher’s medal that’s so important to the character. I also loved Pamela’s blue blouse and dark pants and boots — and how gorgeous did Julie Gonzalo’s hair look under that Southfork sunshine? (Kudos, Charles Yusko!)

My other favorite wardrobe selection from “Trust Me”: the purple shirt Mitch Pileggi wore in the scene where Harris pulled a gun on Judith. Only Pileggi could make a paisley print look badass — and wasn’t it nice to finally see him in something other than the gray T-shirt he’s been wearing since the end of the second season?

What were your favorite looks in “Trust Me”? Share your thoughts in the comments section below and read more “Dallas Styles.”

Filed Under: Dallas Styles, Dallas Styles (TNT), Features Tagged With: AnnaLynne McCord, Charles Yusko, Juan Pablo di Pace, Julie Gonzalo, Linda Gray, Mitch Pileggi, Rachel Sage Kunin, TNT, Trust Me

Critique: TNT’s ‘Dallas’ Episode 27 — ‘Trust Me’

March 5, 2014 by Chris Baker 44 Comments

Dallas, Harris Ryland, Judith Light, Judith Ryland, Mitch Pileggi, TNT, Trust Me

Snow job

Is “Trust Me” the most audacious episode in “Dallas” history? It’s hard to think of another one that shocked me more. Judith Ryland seals a deal with a Mexican drug lord by snorting a few lines of coke, Harris Ryland is revealed as a CIA informant — these are not the kinds of things we’re used to seeing on this show. Some fans are upset with the producers for taking our beloved franchise in such wild directions, but you’ll hear no complaints from me. “Dallas” measures its longevity in decades; at this point, I’d be disappointed if the people in charge weren’t exploring fresh storytelling terrain.

Besides, it’s not like the twists and turns come from out of nowhere. Both scenes fit with the theme of “Trust Me,” which shows how the characters deal with the people who doubt them — and how they deal with their doubts about themselves. The word “trust” pops up repeatedly: Harris tells Judith that Emma can’t be trusted. Elena and Nicolas each tell Carmen to trust their choice to work against the Ewings. Elena tells Christopher to trust her ability to handle Nicolas. Bobby wonders if the old Southfork seismographs can be trusted. Even when “trust” isn’t used, it’s implied: Witness the scene where John Ross stands in front of Pamela, raises his right hand and swears he isn’t cheating with his new secretary. Talk about splitting hairs.

And then there’s Judith’s coke-snorting scene. It’s inexplicably staged in some kind of dirt-floored equestrian arena, where the Mexican drug lord Luis is surrounded by an entourage that includes a young man holding a golden box of cocaine, several thugs toting big guns and two costumed rodeo performers who stand on horses, twirling lassos. A setting like this wouldn’t feel out of place in a Tarantino film. Judith and Harris arrive to meet with Luis, and before you know it, she’s putting Luis’s hands all over her body and talking about the importance of trust in business relationships. Judith implies the point of her self-directed pat down is to prove she’s not wearing a wire, but does anyone doubt she’s also seeking cheap thrills? For that matter, isn’t she also telegraphing a message about her mettle to Harris, who stands next to her, his mouth agape?

The scene continues with Judith shrewdly explaining how she’s going to use shell companies, wastewater trucks and unmapped roads to smuggle Luis’s drugs into Texas — and then we get to the moment that sent “Dallas” fans into a tweeting frenzy on the night “Trust Me” debuted. Judith leans into Luis’s cocaine box, snorts, throws back her head and delivers her hashtag-ready exclamation: “Hot damn! Mama like.” She even rubs a little coke on her gums for good measure. I suppose this is another way for Judith to prove her trustworthiness to the cartel, but let’s not kid ourselves: “Dallas” is trying to shock us — not that there’s anything wrong with that. I love this show’s insistence on being unpredictable. If this scene does nothing else, it demonstrates how eager the people who make “Dallas” are to entertain us. How can you not appreciate that?

As much as I admire Judith Light’s fearlessness in this scene, I have to hand it to Mitch Pileggi, whose reaction shots are priceless. (Director Millicent Shelton, who also helmed last season’s Harris-centric “Let Me In,” is smart enough to keep cutting back to him throughout Judith’s antics in the arena.) I also love how Light and Pileggi play off each other in their other scene in “Trust Me,” when Judith returns to the Ryland roost and announces she’s taking charge of the family trucking — er, transportation — business. Bruce Rasmussen’s script gives Light one delicious line after another, including an allegory that could have rolled off the silver tongue of J.R. Ewing: “Money and morality are like two cars on a one-lane road. When they meet, morality’s going to end up in the ditch.” Light savors every syllable, and once again, Pileggi holds his own. I think it’s telling that after I saw “Trust Me,” I spent more time quoting one of Harris’s lines (“You think you know what you’re getting into, but you don’t”) than any of Judith’s. I don’t know what I love more: Pileggi’s Texas accent, or the way he snarls his dialogue.

It’s also worth noting how much “Trust Me” humanizes Harris Ryland. In the scene where Judith negotiates the new deal with the cartel, notice how Harris doesn’t say a word until Luis implies he’ll hurt Emma if the Rylands don’t hold up their end of the bargain. “My daughter has nothing to do with this!” he says. For that matter, notice how Harris keeps a framed photograph of Ann with baby Emma in his office. This is a man who cares about the women in his life, even if he sometimes calls them names. (Pileggi’s other great line in this episode describes Emma: “She’s a little monster who put me in jail.”)

This also explains why I welcome the episode-ending revelation about Harris’s connection to the CIA, which requires more than a little trust on Bobby and Ann’s behalf. Like Larry Hagman, Pileggi is such a charismatic actor you can’t help but root for his character, no matter how wicked he becomes. I was having a hard time cheering for Harris, though, knowing that he was a drug trafficker. Now I’m glad I can cast those concerns aside. (I can cast them aside, right “Dallas”?) I don’t think there’s any danger of Harris turning into a white knight, but I’m glad to know there are lines he won’t cross.

Of course, as much as the Rylands fascinate me, I would be remiss if I didn’t point out how good the rest of “Trust Me” is. The Southfork barbecue scenes evoke the spirit — if not the down-home grandeur — of Ewing shindigs from days gone by. It’s fun to see John Ross rankle all the women in his life — mother, wife, mistress — by chatting up the other pretty ladies. (One is played by “Survivor” contestant Andrea Boehlke, who is Josh Henderson’s girlfriend in real life.) The only thing I enjoy more is Pamela’s hot dance with the ever-intriguing Nicolas Treviño — not just because it’s good to see Pamela give her flirtatious husband a taste of his own medicine, but also because it demonstrates why the magnetic Juan Pablo Di Pace is such a smart addition to this show. Di Pace enlivens every scene he appears in; as one of my fellow fans pointed out on Twitter the other night, he has chemistry with everyone, including Jesse Metcalfe’s Christopher, whose tête-à-tête with Nicolas over a couple of Miller Lites is another barbecue highlight.

Rasmussen’s script allows “Dallas’s” supporting performers to shine too. No one impresses me more than Kevin Page, whose character Bum has become the conscience of this show. Besides Judith Light’s dialogue, Page has the episode’s most memorable line when he shows John Ross the pictures he took of him and Emma and says, “Grow into your father’s greatness, not his weakness.” Bum’s mysterious-but-strong connection to J.R. makes him the only character on this show who can get away with putting John Ross in his place; he could become an even more effective surrogate father than Uncle Bobby. It’s tempting to chastise Bum for deceiving Sue Ellen about John Ross’s adultery, except there’s no doubt he’s only trying to spare her heartache. And am I the only one who wants to see more scenes between Page and Linda Gray?

This episode’s other M.V.P.: Marlene Forte, who has two great scenes. In the first, Carmen is aghast to learn Elena is working against the family to whom Carmen has pledged her loyalty; in the second, Carmen comes face to face with Nicolas, a boy she helped raise who is now Elena’s partner in crime. I love when Carmen touches the medal around Nicolas’s neck and tells him, “If even for a moment I sense that you are leading either of my children into the darkness, not even St. Christopher will be able to save you.” I’ve always believed Carmen has the potential to become one of this show’s moral centers, and now it looks like that might be happening.

It’s true that Nicolas’s backstory with the Ramoses is a little odd: I suppose we’re meant to believe Carmen and her husband raised him in Mexico but left him behind when they moved to Texas with their biological children, which is why Nicolas isn’t familiar to the Ewings. It’s another example of how the details on this show are sometimes fuzzy, although I’ve learned it’s not worth sweating the small stuff because the new “Dallas” almost always gets the big picture right. Will I still feel that way at the end of this season? Who knows? I have no idea where this series is headed next, but after watching its first 27 hours, I have faith in the people who make it. They’ve earned my respect — and my trust.

Grade: A

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Independent lens

‘TRUST ME’

Season 3, Episode 2

Telecast: March 3, 2014

Audience: 1.9 million viewers on March 3

Writer: Bruce Rasmussen

Director: Millicent Shelton

Synopsis: At Sue Ellen’s request, Bum follows John Ross, but Bum lies and tells her there’s no evidence her son is cheating on Pamela. At the Ewing Barbecue, Christopher and Heather grow closer and Pamela arouses John Ross’s jealousy by dancing with Nicolas. Elena snoops around Bobby’s laptop and discovers an email that connects him and Carlos to Rhonda. Judith takes over Harris’s drug trafficking operation and negotiates a new deal with the cartel. When Bobby and Ann begin investigating Harris’s release from jail, Harris reveals the truth to them: He’s secretly working with the CIA to bring down the cartel.

Cast: John Athas (U.S. Attorney Ellis Larsen), Emma Bell (Emma Ryland), Andrea Boehlke (barbecue guest), Jordana Brewster (Elena Ramos), Christian Clemenson (Howard Rieder), Candace (Jude Demorest), Juan Pablo Di Pace (Nicolas Treviño), Akai Draco (Sherriff Derrick), Patrick Duffy (Bobby Ewing), Julie Gonzalo (Pamela Ewing), Linda Gray (Sue Ellen Ewing), Josh Henderson (John Ross Ewing), Antonio Jaramillo (Luis), Judith Light (Judith Ryland), AnnaLynne McCord (Heather), Jesse Metcalfe (Christopher Ewing), Kevin Page (Bum), Gino Anthony Pesi (George Tatangelo), Mitch Pileggi (Harris Ryland), Brenda Strong (Ann Ewing)

“Trust Me” is available at DallasTNT.com, Amazon.com and iTunes. Watch the episode and share your comments below.

Filed Under: Critiques, Critiques (TNT), Opinion Tagged With: Andrea Boehlke, Bruce Rasmussen, Josh Henderson, Juan Pablo di Pace, Judith Light, Kevin Page, Larry Hagman, Let Me In, Linda Gray, Marlene Forte, Millicent Shelton, Mitch Pileggi, TNT, Trust Me

The Dal-List: Classic ‘Dallas’s’ 8 Ewing Barbecues, Ranked

March 3, 2014 by Chris Baker 13 Comments

Dallas, John Ross Ewing, Josh Henderson, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes Ewing, Trust Me, TNT

Upholding tradition

The Ewings throw another Southfork barbecue in “Trust Me,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode. Here’s a list of every barbecue from the classic show’s era, ranked in order of preference. (Please note: The two rodeo episodes aren’t included. Don’t worry; they’ll get their own list one day.)

Bert Remsen, Bobby Ewing, Clayton Farlow, Dallas, Dandy Dandridge, Howard Keel, Patrick Duffy

Top gun

8. Barbecue VIII (1987). The original “Dallas’s” final barbecue feels a little warmed over, sad to say. Things briefly get exciting when aging wildcatter Dandy Dandridge (Bert Remsen) shows up and tries to shoot Cliff — a nifty bit of poetic justice that recalls Digger’s attempt to kill Jock in “Dallas: The Early Years.” The rest of the affair, though, is more of a retread than an homage: J.R. and Cliff exchange insults for the umpteenth time, Sue Ellen once again tries to get under her husband’s skin and Christopher spends another episode moping around because he’s adopted. Is this “Groundhog Day” or a Southfork shindig?

Cliff Barnes, Dallas, Ken Kercheval, Linda Gray, Sue Ellen Ewing

Dances with wolves

7. Barbecue II (1982). Most of the action at this party happens on the dance floor: With Pam upstairs mooning over baby Christopher, Bobby waltzes with Katherine, whose crush on her brother-in-law is as plain as Ray’s extra-martial interest in sexy Toni. Later, J.R. stands on the balcony and seethes while watching Sue Ellen and Cliff (Linda Gray, Ken Kercheval) — whose shirt appears to have lost all its buttons — have a jolly time two-stepping below. As if that wasn’t bad enough, Miss Ellie receives the fateful phone call informing her that Jock’s helicopter crashed on its way home. Way to kill the festive mood, “Dallas.”

Afton Cooper, Audrey Landers, Cliff Barnes, Dallas, Ken Kercheval

Birds of a feather

6. Barbecue IV (1983). This barbecue is mostly fun: Bobby and Mark Graison give each other the stink eye at the bar, Jenna Wade is bitchy to Pam on the patio and Afton Cooper (Audrey Landers) runs around the driveway in a Native American-inspired outfit that features the most strategically placed tassels in the history of costume design. So why doesn’t this soiree rank higher? Blame baby-faced stalker Peter Richards, who summons Sue Ellen to the barn, where he gives her a smooch and professes his undying love for her. Gross! It’s enough to make us lose our appetite for Mama’s chili.

Dallas, Fern Fitzgerald, Jamie Ewing, Jenilee Harrison, J.R. Ewing, Marilee Stone

Slap splash

5. Barbecue V (1984). Myth: Every time the Ewings throw a barbecue, someone gets pushed into the Southfork swimming pool. Fact: This only happens once, and it occurs at the 1984 hootenanny, when Marilee Stone (Fern Fitzgerald) slaps Cousin Jamie (Jenilee Harrison), who responds by shoving Marilee into the water. The best part is the hilarious kicker: When J.R. reaches down to pull Ms. Stone out of the chlorinated water, he says, “Marilee, you all right, honey? Did it go up your nose?” No matter how many times I watch this episode, I never tire of seeing Larry Hagman deliver that line.

Dallas, J.R. Ewing, Larry Hagman, Pam Ewing, Victoria Principal

Dis-invite

4. Barbecue VII (1986). This hoedown ends on a dramatic note, with Bobby arriving with evidence that proves Wes Parmalee, the man who claims to be back-from-the-dead Jock, is an imposter. Before we get to that, though, we’re treated to several scenes that showcase Hagman’s comedic genius. In one, J.R. chastises Pam (Victoria Principal) for inviting “that moron brother of yours to my barbecue.” Later, J.R. witnesses Cliff and Jamie’s latest marital spat and can’t resist offering his two cents. Jamie: “You know, Cliff Barnes, you’re the sorriest excuse for a man that I have ever met!” J.R.: “Well, I’ll second that!”

Drunk history

3. Barbecue I (1978). Here’s the one that started it all. “Dallas’s” first season ends with an episode that takes place in a single day, as Texas’s newest in-laws, the Ewings and the Barneses, get together for an epic Southfork cookout. Everyone gets down in the dirt at this one: Digger and Sue Ellen each fall off the wagon, J.R. falls flat on his face when Bobby punches him and Pam falls from the hayloft and suffers a miscarriage. My favorite scene belongs to caterers Tilly and Sam, who spend the afternoon gossiping about the Ewings. This is the only time these characters ever appeared on “Dallas”; is it too late to bring them back?

Center of attention

2. Barbecue III (1982). The second barbecue of 1982 finds everyone hatin’ on poor J.R. The members of the cartel are royally peeved that he’s undercut them by opening a chain of cut-rate gas stations, and so is Bobby, who’s so upset, he gets drunk (!), neglects Pam (!!) and flirts with Holly Harwood (!!!). Finally, the cartel gangs up and confronts J.R. It’s showdown at the Southfork corral! But wait, what’s this? Here come the other Ewings, who circle J.R. and remind the cartel that when you take on one member of the clan, you take them all on. It’s not just the quintessential Ewing Barbecue scene, it’s quintessential “Dallas.”

Dale Midkiff, Dallas, Dallas: The Early Years, Jock Ewing, Molly Hagan

Get the party started

1. Barbecue VI (1986). My sentimental favorite. The prequel movie “Dallas: The Early Years” culminates at a 1951 barbecue, where a teenaged J.R. loses his virginity in the barn and a drunken Digger shows up with a gun and takes aim at Jock (Dale Midkiff). Ellie (Molly Hagan) intervenes and saves her husband’s life, and then with all the Barnes and Ewing children frolicking around them, Jock embraces Ellie and turns reflective. “What are these poor kids going to end up like?” he asks. Cut to the final scene: After bratty Cliff tangles with J.R., he drags kid sister Pammy away from her new playmate — little Bobby Ewing. Jerrold Immel’s famous theme music rises in the background, the camera pulls back for a bird’s eye view of the ranch and then the familiar shots from “Dallas’s” classic title sequence begin to sweep across the screen. Now that’s how you end a barbecue!

What’s your favorite “Dallas” barbecue? Share your comments below and read more “Dal-Lists.”

Filed Under: Dal-Lists, Opinion Tagged With: Audrey Landers, Bert Remsen, Dale Midkiff, Dallas: The Early Years, Fern Fitzgerald, Jenilee Harrison, Jerrold Immel, Josh Henderson, Julie Gonzalo, Ken Kercheval, Larry Hagman, Linda Gray, Molly Hagan, TNT, Trust Me, Victoria Principal

Dallas Burning Questions: Season 3, Week 2

March 3, 2014 by Chris Baker 7 Comments

Bobby Ewing, Christopher Ewing, Dallas, Elena Ramos, Jesse Metcalfe, John Ross Ewing, Jordana Brewster, Josh Henderson, Julie Gonzalo, Pamela Rebecca Barnes Ewing, Linda Gray, Patrick Duffy, Return, Sue Ellen Ewing, TNT

Huddle up, y’all

Here are the questions we’re pondering as we await tonight’s telecast of “Trust Me,” TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode:

• What’s Elena and Nicolas’s next move? In “The Return,” last week’s third-season premiere, Elena (Jordana Brewster) formed a secret alliance with Cliff (Ken Kercheval) and agreed to help him prove the Ewings framed him. She lied to Carmen (Marlene Forte) about her scheme and took a job at Ewing Global, where she began snooping around for evidence against the family. Elena also recruited her childhood friend Nicolas Treviño (Juan Pablo Di Pace), a self-made billionaire who used to be known as Joaquin, to serve as Cliff’s proxy. Nicolas, who considers Elena’s parents to be his own, told Elena he wants revenge as much as she does. What will Elena and Nicolas do next — and what will Carmen say when she discovers their plan?

• Will Bobby or John Ross prevail? To finance a major drilling venture in the Arctic, the Ewings decided to sell off their company’s consumer division, but Nicolas scuttled the deal. John Ross (Josh Henderson) suggested the family could raise the capital for the Arctic project by drilling on Southfork, but Bobby (Patrick Duffy) refused to go along, pointing out that he and Gary control the mineral rights. John Ross countered with evidence that suggests the oil under Southfork has risen to the surface, which means he could access it as the ranch’s co-owner. Will Bobby or John Ross win this fight?

• What will Sue Ellen do? With Harris (Mitch Pileggi) in jail and Judith (Judith Light) in a “rehab hospital,” Emma (Emma Bell) became Ryland Transport’s chief executive. She agreed to give John Ross access to the company’s drilling and cargo ships — but only if he agreed to continue sleeping with her. He did, but he wasn’t very careful about it. When Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) spotted him coming out of Emma’s bedroom, John Ross lied and said he and Emma were just talking business. Sue Ellen didn’t look like she believed her son. What will she do with her suspicion that he’s a cheat?

• Where does Harris go from here? The Mendez-Ochoa cartel bribed a judge to release Harris from jail and sent two shady characters to greet Harris as he emerged from custody. The men showed Harris a picture of Emma and Ann (Brenda Strong) and told him if he doesn’t resume his drug shipments, they’ll make Emma wish she was dead. What will Harris do?

• What’s next for Christopher? After Elena apologized to Pamela (Julie Gonzalo) for concealing Drew’s role in the rig explosion, Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) told Elena he was sorry for treating her so badly in Zurich. Elena told him she’s not ready to take him back, which is just as well since Christopher seemed quite taken with Heather (AnnaLynne McCord), a spunky Southfork ranch hand. Will she help him heal his broken heart?

What “Dallas Burning Questions” are on your mind? Share your comments below and watch TNT’s “Dallas” tonight.